let the good times roll...

27

2012-02-10T08:00:00.000-05:00

Today I turn 27 years old.

This is the first time in my entire life that my age sounds old to me. I don't actually think 27 is old. I just think it sounds old.

So in honor of my birthday, I thought I'd record 27 things about myself.

Actually, that sounds like it's going to take a lot of energy to come up with and I'm 27 now, ya know? I don't have as much energy as I used to.

source

Happy birthday to me!

I know you were trying to be helpful...

2012-02-08T08:00:00.000-05:00

but telling my 22 month old that everything will be ok as he throws the tantrum of all tantrums is not helpful. At all.

See how he's just screaming? See how he can't even control his own body? See how he's so out of his mind that even if I said, "Here's a big ol' cookie for you to eat right now!" he wouldn't be able to comprehend that I was actually giving him something amazing and would continue to cry?

Ya, so you, a stranger, telling my son, who remember, is out of his mind right now, that everything will be ok is the opposite of helpful. It just clues me in to 3 things:

1- I look like a terrible mother because my son is out of control.

2- I look like a terrible mother because I'm literally dragging my son out of the store and am about 2 seconds away from just leaving him there.

3- You may be considering calling child protective services because you can tell I'm about to lose it. (Luckily, we took a few minutes to compose ourselves outside. Well, I did. Blake kept screaming.)

Really, I know you were trying to be helpful. And I thank you for not making a rude comment about our spectacle. You really were very nice about it all.

But next time, just ignore us. Don't make any jokes about how it must be nap time. Don't even look at us. Because at that very moment, the moment where you want to stare and say something, I actually want to be invisible. So just pretend like we are.

Adventures with a 1 year old- Playing with the big(ger) kids

2012-02-06T08:00:00.000-05:00

Most of our experiences at the playground involve Blake trying to get kids to chase him. And usually those kids aren't too interested. A few times Blake has tried to play with a group of little kids only to be rejected (usually it's girls who do the rejecting.)

But on a 60 degree January day, Blake was actually invited to join a group.

"Come on! We're gonna make pizza! Tell him to come on!"

Blake happily ran around with 2 other boys while one of them pretended to make pizza. And then pretended that someone was touching their pizza and ran around trying to defend their imaginary pie. All Blake understood was that these boys were running and he wanted to run around with them.

Pretty much the cutest thing ever.

These are a few of my favorite things...

2012-02-03T08:00:00.000-05:00

Anyone who knows me well knows that I have a long list of pet peeves. I'm not sure why they are called pet peeves. I'm going to have to research that one. Anyway so I thought instead of writing a post about my pet peeves, I would put a positive spin on things and write about the opposite: things people do that I like. You'll see.

1. There is nothing more glorious than when people drive at the proper speed, use their blinkers, and know the rules of the road. In fact, I cannot express how much joy it brings me while driving when a motorist who is waiting to turn left understands that I have the right of way when turning right. I have often thought of making a sign that says, "Thank you for knowing how to drive" and holding it up as I pass by. They should know someone appreciates them.

2. I also find joy when people actively listen to what I am trying to say without interjecting until I am finished. Now, I know in heated debates it is tempting to jump in and state one's opinions. But in general conversation nothing makes me more happy than being able to finish a complete thought.

3. Another of my favorite things is when people eat, but I can't hear them eating. Now of course there are foods that are inherently noisy: chips, apples, uncooked pasta, and other things I can't think of right now. And I do understand that it can be difficult to chew with one's lips completely closed, especially if the eater puts too much food in their mouth. But I do appreciate a person who can eat quietly.

4. Nothing brings a smile to my face faster than when I am walking on a sidewalk and one of the two people that are walking towards me moves so I can pass them without being pushed off the sidewalk. Ahh yes, smiles all around for that one.

5. I love to see people utilizing public trash cans. And dog poop bags.

Adventures with a 1 year old-Walking...everywhere

2012-02-01T08:00:00.000-05:00

Blake is nearly 30 lbs.

His stroller is about 9 lbs.

That means I'm hoisting close to 40 lbs up and down our stairs, up and down subway stairs, up and down the stairs of friends we visit.

So in recent weeks I've started taking Blake out without his stroller. Our first attempt ended in me throwing him over my shoulder and swearing I'd only take him out if he was strapped into something. It all fell apart when he refused to hold my hand as we crossed the street.

But, after some practicing around the neighborhood, Blake does pretty well walking with me on our little outings. The rule is he either holds my hand or I have to carry him. He generally opts to hold my hand.

It is a pain when he decides to throw a tantrum as we're walking and everything we do takes twice as long when he walks, but it's nice to not have to worry about taking the stroller everywhere.

I've also added a few phrases to my daily vocabulary:

Don't step in the poop!

Hurry hurry hurry hurry!

Do you want me to carry you? (No is usually the answer.)

If you don't hold my hand then I have to carry you.

Yes, it's a rock. Can we please keep going?!

I can't believe that soon I'll be writing about my adventures with a 2 year old!

Hi, my name is Whitney

2012-01-30T14:21:00.002-05:00

(Hi Whitney)

And I'm a chocoholic.

Seriously. In high school I could put away chocolate like nobody's business. A handful of M&M's? Try half a bag. No, not half a bag that you get out of a vending machine. Half a bag for A PARTY.

For my birthday, my husband got me a 42 oz. bag of peanut M&M's (my personal fave). I polished that off in about a week and a half.

Unfortunately, I don't have the metabolism that I had in high school (ugh, that makes me feel old). And, I'll be honest. Downing half a bag of M&M's at any age probably isn't the healthiest thing to do.

So a few months ago I decided to cut back on the amount of sugar I was consuming. I thought I could still buy cookies and brownies and just exhibit enough willpower to not consume a whole batch in 2 days. But old habits die hard.

In fact, those habits didn't die at all. If there were cookies or treats in the house, I ate them. All. The only way for me to not scarf down a batch of cookies was to not have them in my house. So I stopped buying that stuff. (no ice cream, no cookies, no brownies, no nothin'!)

I thought I had overcome my addiction. But last week I bought some M&M's to give away for Valentine's Day. Well, that's how I rationalized buying them. But guess what? They didn't make it to Valentine's Day. They're gone. I ate them all. Blake helped me, but I ate most of them. I really wish I had more willpower when it comes to chocolate. But the only thing that will keep me from eating chocolate besides not buying it is if it has mint in it. Mint chocolate anything=gross.

Apparently this is going to be a lifelong struggle.

the saddest words ever uttered

2012-01-27T13:11:00.000-05:00

Ok, so that's kind of dramatic.

In the almost 2 years (feels more like 5) that we've lived here, the majority of my time has been spent dreaming about when we get to leave. As much as I've tried to embrace where we live, it's proven difficult. On good days I can handle unfamiliar city life without many complaints. On bad days I entertain the idea of just packing a bag for Blake and me and catching the next flight out of here (of course Evan would join us as soon as he got home from work). At one point I had decided that we needed to move away as soon as possible. I encouraged Evan to look for a job elsewhere and I even started looking for jobs for him.

But with Jerky McJerkFace living downstairs, we decided moving now (instead of waiting to move until we officially leave NYC) was the best option for us. We were able to find an apartment that better suits our needs even if it is a bit smaller than our current place.

As we walked to the subway after signing our new lease, Evan said, "Let's face it. We aren't going anywhere any time soon." His statement almost took my breath away. And then I realized he's probably right. And it's probably time for me to stop thinking otherwise.

It's exhausting to spend your days dreaming of being anywhere than where you actually are. So I have to face it. We're going to be here for a while longer. Not forever. Just a while a longer.

Crock pot cookin'

2012-01-18T11:59:00.000-05:00

Last week I had a brilliant idea: I was going to find crock pot recipes and use my crock pot everyday. And it was going to be fabulous. And easy.

Here's what I learned:

1) Out of 4 crock pot recipes, only 1 made it into my monthly meal rotation.

2) It's nice to throw the ingredients together and forget about dinner until you're ready to eat.

3) Cleaning a crock pot is annoying.

4) Always have a back up dinner (i.e. frozen pizza, frozen skillet meals) ready in case your crock pot dinner turns out to be disgusting (and there's a good chance that's going to happen.)

So my fabulous crock pot week didn't really turn out as fabulously as I had hoped. I'm glad that I found one recipe that I can use. And with some recipe suggestions from friends, hopefully I'll be able to test out a few more recipes and add them to my list of delicious and doable slow cooker meals.

Dearest Neighbor,

2012-01-13T23:16:00.000-05:00

Over the past month I've gone from feeling bad for having such a loud child, to hating you, to reading about how I'm supposed to love you and then trying to love you, back to hating you, then to thinking you are just plain ridiculous.

I know you think I'm one of those mothers who lets her child run amok all day long with very few restrictions. But I promise you, I am not.

Despite what you think (and what you accused me of tonight in our somewhat heated conversation), I do not "entice him to run around". I absolutely never chase him. EVER. When you hear me calling his name, it's usually to either to get him to stop running or to be quiet. I spend most of my days now pleading with him to be quiet. And sometimes that pleading turns into yelling. And time out. All because you say we are too loud.

And despite what you also accused me of, we do have a rug. And we have a play mat for him to play on.

Yes, he does run around most days. He also loves to dance when he hears music. I usually let him do it for about 1 minute and then force him to stop, which results in tantrums, which result in more noise.

Yes, he does drop and throw his toys sometimes. And I try to teach him not to do that. But he's 22 months old. That basically describes a 22 month old: really loud and not very good at listening, probably because they are so loud.

source

I was happy to hear that you got a set of ear plugs. It shows me that you are at least trying to do something to solve the problem and not just putting it all on me. But like I said a million times tonight, there's not much I can do. It's not my fault that you work at home. It's not my fault that our apartment isn't properly insulated.

Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to focus on my family. I'm going to focus on what is best for my child. I told you I'd try even harder to reduce the noise and I will. I warned you that there will still be noise. But your ridiculous claims and requests tonight have taught me 2 things:

I'm not a confrontational person, but I won't let you (or anyone else) walk all over me. (Thank you, NY for bringing that out in me.) And I made that clear tonight.

I'm going to make sure Blake knows he is loved. It never really occurred to me that other people might not be too fond of Blake. He's cute and sweet, and gives great hugs. And he deserves to be a 2 year old and do things a 2 year old likes to do. Whether you like it or not.

Sincerely,
Your upstairs neighbor

P.S. I'm terribly sorry that we were sick last week. All of the coughing you said you heard must have been so annoying.

Seeing New York- Transit Museum

2012-01-11T13:56:00.000-05:00

Last week our friend Lindsay invited Blake and me on a little excursion to the New York Transit Museum. So we hopped on a train...to go look at more trains!

There was an electricity exhibit that the boys had fun tinkering with.

And they even let us drive a subway train! Turns out it's totally doable while you hold a small child!

Ok not really.

I forgot to clear off my camera card, so I only got 2 pictures. The rest of the museum has a buses that you can "drive" or be a passenger on. Blake loved being behind the steering wheel of an MTA bus. And Garrett (one of Lindsays' boys) was gracious enough to pick us up and drive us all the way to New York City!

We even went down to a subway platform and toured some of the old trains they used to use. It was neat to see what the old trains look like and how different some of them are from the trains we ride.

It was nice to get out and explore the city a little more.

Thanks, Lindsay!

Concerto No. 5

2012-01-02T08:00:00.000-05:00

New Year

2011-12-31T08:00:00.000-05:00

Remember my new year's resolution post last year? Of course you don't because I don't remember what you posted a year ago either.

Like every year, I forgot about my resolutions by March. But when I looked back at that post and reflected on the past year, I realized that I did some of the things I resolved to do:

I have tried to eat healthier. I now consume considerably less sugar than I used to. (Well, not counting the past week...)

I exercise more regularly and plan to continue to do that. (Thank you, Shape Up NYC for your free zumba class 2 times a week.)

My calling has allowed me to serve people.

I don't always have a book I'm reading, but I am reading more than I used to. I love curling up with a book while Blake naps. When I start a book I usually don't get anything else done until I finish it.

I'd say it's been a pretty good year for me! This year as far as resolutions go, I'm going to focus more on my family. This year our family will:

pray together each night
have family home evening each week
laugh more together

That's it. Sounds simple, but I know it will be a challenge because it's been a challenge this year. And even though I'll forget come March, hopefully by next December I'll be happy with how much our family has grown together.

Happy New Year!

unfortunate change

2011-12-23T08:00:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago I was finally able to comfortably wear a pair of jeans I could wear before I was pregnant. I've been going to zumba classes a few times a week and trying to cut down on the amount of sugar I eat.

I'm not really a diet person. I don't like having to measure out my food, count calories, or put certain foods off limits. If I tell myself I can't eat something, then that's all I want to eat. I figure if I stay active and eat healthy foods then I'll be ok.

What I haven't really thought about is how my body has changed since having a baby. I kept blaming it on just being overweight before I was pregnant, being pregnant, and then not losing the weight after I had Blake.

But now that I've lost a few pounds, I've realized my body has changed. Unfortunately. So now I get to play "This fits me here, but not here. Oh and let's not bring attention there. Or there."

I already hate shopping so this "new" body I've discovered is not really helping. At all.

I'm totally in favor of this (7:57-8:30...or the whole thing if you need a good laugh):

I think I could rock a one piece silver suit with the V stripe and boots...

evolution of dance

2011-12-21T08:00:00.000-05:00

Yes. He dropped it like it was hot.

Seeing New York-Transit Museum Train Show

2011-12-19T08:00:00.000-05:00

It's nice having friends who know the not-so-well-known fun things to do in the city. On Saturday we headed to Grand Central Station to visit the Transit Museum Annex to see their train display.

The ceiling at Grand Central is really neat!

After wandering around for a few minutes, we asked for directions. And if we ever go again I'll probably have to ask for directions again. I was thinking it was going to be museum-esque, so that's what I was looking for. Instead, it was more museum gift shop-esque. But in the end, it didn't matter what it looked like, their train display was pretty cool! And free!

Blake had a great time watching the trains. And if we had let him, he would have climbed right in and destroyed the whole thing!

Even though their train display was fun to see, Blake found something he was more interested in.

Possible Christmas gift?

Seeing New York-Holiday Window Displays and Santa!

2011-12-16T08:00:00.000-05:00

I'm going to be honest. We could have just seen Santa and our night would have been perfect. But I feel a sense of urgency when it comes to experiencing all things NYC because I don't know how long we'll be here to experience them. If I had my way this would be our last Christmas in New York. So I bundled Blake up, forced him into his stroller, wondered who I was really doing this for, and headed to the city.

We strolled along 5th Avenue, stopping briefly to look at the window displays.

By the time we hit Rockefeller Center, Blake was about done. I kind of felt like I was just rushing around, trying to take a quick picture, mentally checking off things from my bucket list.

The best window display in my opinion was at Lord and Taylor. The others were neat, but Blake didn't seem too interested in them. He cried when we left Lord and Taylor's!

In order to cheer Blake up, we stopped for a New York slice...hahahahaha! (You should've seen the looks I got as I tried to take a picture of this.)

Our final stop was at Macy's. After looking at their window display we headed inside to see Santa. We weaved our way through the store to find the elevator...the elevator just for strollers and wheelchairs being operated by an employee. Shocker!

We stepped onto the 8th floor and walked to Santaland.

singin' tree...kind of creepy

It was there we experienced several miracles: no line, happy Santaland workers who were excited to see us, and a 20 month old who actually sat on Santa's lap sans protesting and tears.

All in all, it was a chilly, but fun night. We even saw a free concert in the subway! It was some of the best music I've heard in the subway. So good that we missed our train!

This will go down as one of the best NYC experiences we've had as a family!

Adventures with a 1 year old- Bathtub art

2011-12-13T22:54:00.001-05:00

I saw this idea on pinterest, perhaps one of the most addicting websites ever. I was hesitant at first because I didn't want Blake to put any of this stuff in his mouth. But I think we are finally past that stage, except for the occasional acorn.

To make these bath paints, just mix shaving cream and food coloring together. I mix mine in little plastic containers. You can also use a muffin tin. Blake loves doing this before bath time. And I have to say it gives me a good ten minutes to just sit and relax. I'm in the bathroom with him, but I don't sit on the edge of the tub because the tub is dry and not slippery.

Just a little warning: The food coloring has stained the grout on our shower wall, but it tends to fade after a while. And I have noticed that Blake's hands and wherever else he gets the paint are stained as well. It usually fades or is totally gone by the end of his bath. Totally worth it to me for all the fun he has with it.

Apartment Search: NYC edition

2011-12-08T13:06:00.001-05:00

If you put the same effort into remodeling this apartment that you did capitalizing every other letter in your post title, then maybe I'd want to rent your apartment. Also, cats aren't that exciting.

Don't you dare classify a studio apartment as a 2 bedroom apartment. A studio apartment means there is a room. One.

WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME?!

Wow! Only $1450 a month and it comes with a talking closet!

Wow, it's near allllllllllllllll? That's grrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

Here's a little advice: the creepier the pictures look, the less likely I am to rent your apartment. Oh, and put the toilet lid down.

Looks more like somewhere they'd film an episode of Law and Order:SVU

Cabinets in the kitchen? Why, that's unheard of!

Hey this looks nice! A 2 bedroom for $1395?

Nice kitchen. Ohhh a dishwasher!

And look at the outside of the building!

Maybe I've found somethi...oh. Wait. You said this is what the building looks like, but google maps street view shows me this:

Scam.

laundry day

2011-12-06T12:51:00.001-05:00

Can you tell?

too much to ask?

2011-11-30T08:00:00.000-05:00

2 bedrooms
a dishwasher
a washer
a dryer
a small patch of grass to play on
walking distance to a grocery store
no pests
$1500-ish a month in rent

You will literally get laughed right out of your broker's office if these are your criteria for an apartment in NYC. You can have one of these. Maybe.

to leash or not to leash

2011-11-28T08:00:00.000-05:00

It seems in the last few weeks, Blake has decided he hates his stroller. And forcing him into it usually makes me regret deciding to take him somewhere. So I've been contemplating getting him one of those "this looks like a monkey backpack but it's really a way for me to keep you from running out in front of a car" leashes.

But then I saw this:

And I laughed as I realized Blake would be exactly like the kid on the ground. As soon as I tried to pull him in the right direction on a walk around the nabe, he'd collapse to the ground and I'd be stuck either dragging him along or hoisting him over my shoulder and carrying him home (both resulting in judgmental looks from passersby).

Personally I think the little backpack leashes look silly. And before I had a kid I never thought I'd consider getting one. But I totally understand why parents use them. Especially if you are going somewhere by yourself and need to be able to keep track of multiple children.

I don't look down on parents who use them. If they work for your kid, great! If they don't (see picture above) then good luck finding something that does. I'm currently searching for a solution myself.

weekly winter activity

2011-11-25T08:00:00.000-05:00

Finger painting day naturally coincides with bath day.

this is what I get...

2011-11-23T08:00:00.000-05:00

for trying to take my son on a walk:

starts off pretty good

sunny, but cold

return home because Blake insists on walking into oncoming traffic

horizontal tantrum

Hey! An acorn!

Another one!

Hmmm, I wonder...

Yep. I can step on them.

Beware

2011-11-21T08:00:00.000-05:00

The 3-binked monster

new 'do

2011-11-19T09:58:00.001-05:00

And you thought you'd have to wait until Monday!

I'm having fun playing with it! Although with a toddler running around there isn't much time to play with it. But I really like it!

chopped

2011-11-18T08:00:00.000-05:00

I'm getting my hair cut tonight. I'm going pretty drastic and chopping most of it off. Hopefully the end result will be something like this:

Now, I know I'm not Mandy Moore. I don't expect to turn into her when I get this hair cut. But, I do think I'll like the end result.

When I told my mother I was getting my hair cut short, she so graciously sent me this blast from the past:

I'll be praying to the gods of hair that I won't have a repeat of what my family so lovingly calls "the mushroom".

(And while I have this uber embarrassing picture of myself posted on my blog, can I just say I really have never looked in the mirror and seen this person. How did this photographer manage to capture a side of myself that I've never seen? Ugh, I can't even bare to look at this picture for too long. (And if anyone says this looks exactly like me, I'm going to scream.))

tired

2011-11-16T08:00:00.000-05:00

Me too, kid. Me too.

sign

2011-11-14T08:00:00.000-05:00

You know, gabage. (rhymes with cabbage)

Kind of like Pip at 8:20.

"What do we look like? Garbage?"

Thanks for the laughs, Brooklyn.

chores

2011-11-11T12:53:00.001-05:00

Too early? Na.

sick

2011-11-09T12:02:00.001-05:00

I'm on my second bag of M&M's today. I bought both of them knowing I was going to eat them as soon as I got home. It's been that kind of morning.

To be honest, it all started around 8pm last night. I was reading Blake his bedtime stories when I noticed he kept sticking his tongue out like he had a hair in his mouth. I didn't think much of it and tried to fish around in his mouth to see if there was anything in there that shouldn't be. No luck. Before I laid him down I took him into the kitchen for a drink of water to clear out whatever was in his mouth that had become so bothersome. And then he puked.

All of his dinner. Refunded. (Note to Blake: Let's try chewing your food from now on, k?)

I yelled to Evan for backup as Blake stood and pointed to the contents of his stomach now occupying the kitchen floor saying, "ewwww!". We got that mess cleaned up and swapped the barfy pajamas for some clean ones. Blake didn't seem to think he was sick as he ran around and played like normal. Freak barfing? We at the Jordan household are veterans when it comes to barfing so we took his temperature, gave him some water and decided he was probably ok since he was acting like he felt fine. Into bed he went.

30 minutes later: vomit.

This required the changing of sheets and new pajamas.

More water, mess cleaned up, no sheets-just a towel this time-and he was off to dreamland.

And then he threw up again. At this point there wasn't much left in his little tummy and it was horrible to watch him struggle. We decided to get him some pedialite and keep him up for a while to see if he'd keep it down. We finally wised up and followed him around with a little bucket to catch any upchuck that might decide to spew from his little body. Sure enough, he threw up a few more times before conking out.

Evan and I hopped into to bed and I said a quick prayer for Blake to be able to sleep through the night.

At 1 a.m. I awoke to the sounds of, well, you know. I called a 24 hour nurse hot line to get some advice on what to do. I really didn't want to take Blake to the ER, but he could not keep anything in his stomach and he was so exhausted that I was getting nervous that he'd need medical attention immediately. The decision was made to wait a while longer to see if he'd go back to sleep, but he threw up again for the seventh time. I tried to call the on-call pediatrician, but didn't get a return call until 2 hours later. By that time Blake was asleep and it was 5:30 in the morning. He had been asleep for 2 hours so I thought it was ok to wait and take him to the doctor when they opened.

Blake woke up around 7 and ate a light breakfast before we headed to the doctor.

Diagnosis: chest congestion brought on by seasonal allergies and drainage of mucus into the stomach causing nausea.

Treatment: nebulizer treatments 3 times a day for a week, antibiotic once a day for 5 days, prescription cough medicine 2 times a day for 5 days, and allergy medicine once a day until the end of November.

The nebulizer treatment is enough to make me want to assume the fetal position and hum to myself.

Thus, 2 bags of M&M's consumed within minutes of each other.

bad mom

2011-11-09T08:00:00.000-05:00

Movies. TV. Impatience.

I've been a bad mom lately. As Blake gets older I'm finding it more difficult to keep him entertained. Guess what he's doing right now? Sitting quietly on the floor watching Toy Story 3. Guess what he was doing 5 minutes before that? Destroying our DVD player.

I hate using the television to distract him, but sometimes that's the only way I know how to keep him busy while I clean or make dinner. And as a 19 month old, his attention span with most other activities is only a few minutes. But when he watches TV or a movie I know I can get a pretty good chunk of time to do something. I see activities to do with toddlers and think, "Maybe I'll try that!" But as I read the details I think, "Well, Blake will just end up eating that." or "I'm going to take a few hours preparing an activity for him to be done with it in 5 minutes. And then what do I do?"

With the weather getting colder, I know our trips to the playground are numbered. Pretty soon it's going to be too cold to walk 10 blocks to the nicer playground and play for an hour. And after checking our expenses over the last few months, any fun outings we may go on this winter to relieve cabin fever need to be free. Better yet, we need to get paid to go do fun things.

I'm not the type of mom that will never allow her children to watch any TV (obviously). But I can't seem to find a balance between a little bit of TV a few times a week and fun, engaging, educational activities that Blake can have fun with. It's kind of turning into this vicious cycle I can't seem to break.

Tell myself no TV today.

Breakfast.

Playtime.

Eats crayons.

Crayons taken away.

Tantrum.

Redirection.

Playtime.

Tries to destroy our DVDs.

DVDs taken away.

Tantrum.

Snack time.

Reading.

Throws books.

Book hits Mom.

Patience is gone.

Tantrum.

Movie.

And it's not even noon yet.

I'm not complaining about how difficult motherhood is. I just hate feeling like a bad mom because of my lack of patience and willingness to plop my kid in front of the television for a few minutes of peace. Inevitably those few minutes turn into 90 minutes. I just feel kind of stuck in these bad habits I'm creating.

fruit loops

2011-11-07T08:00:00.001-05:00

I've started a running list of things I can't feed Blake.

#1: Hot chocolate

#2: Fruit loops

Both of these items cause Blake to ask for them incessantly. How does a 19 month old ask for hot chocolate or fruit loops incessantly, you ask? He walks around saying, "juice!" and refuses anything in his sippy cup that isn't hot chocolate or every 30 minutes he asks for 'froral' (his term for cereal). I'm not opposed to Blake having either one of these items, but when that's all he wants to eat it becomes a problem.

You can imagine his dismay when I told him the 'froral' was all gone.

Me: Hey Blake! Are you enjoying your cereal?

Blake: Can I have more froral? It's over there, in the pantry.

Me: I think you've had enough.

Blake: That's preposterous!

Blake: Hahaha I know, I have had a lot!

Blake: But seriously, can I have some more?

Me: It's all gone!

Blake: (stunned silence)

2011-11-07T08:00:00.000-05:00

Blake- 6 months

Me- 6 months

Seeing New York- Brooklyn Bridge Park (Pier 6)

2011-11-04T08:00:00.000-04:00

During a burst of motivation, I decided it would be fun to visit the playground at Pier 6 at Brooklyn Bridge Park. Even better, we had some friends come along to join in the fun. AND even better than that, we ate lunch at Chipotle. Our children made a huge mess, but the food was too good for us to be worried about that!

Don't be fooled. Blake still hates swings.

This is his, "I'm going really fast!" face. Love that kid!

I'm not sure how often we'll visit the Pier 6 playground because it's not super close, but we did have a great time!

A Brooklyn Night

2011-11-02T08:00:00.000-04:00

Happy Halloween!

2011-10-31T12:54:00.002-04:00

I was really excited for Blake's Halloween costume this year. I came up with it all on my own AND it was super easy to create!

Unfortunately, the stickers that were supposed to stick so well to Blake's shirt didn't stick well at all. And when I tried to secure them with tape, it made them even more enticing to mess with.

Even more unfortunate is the fact that I didn't get any pictures of Blake in his costume (or any of me in mine) during our ward "Harvest Party", which is the only time we will be wearing our costumes*. So for the sake of memories, I recreated Blake's costume. And I digitally recreated mine.

You can be impressed with my MS paint skills.

Can you figure out what we are? (Check the comments for the answer!)

*You may be wondering why we only wore our costumes to our ward ~~Halloween Party~~ Harvest Party and not to go trick-or-treating. It's because we aren't going trick-or-treating. There are several reasons for this and all of them do a great job of taking the wind out of Halloween's sails:

1- Blake is 19 months old and while I'm sure he'd love to get a bag full of candy, as the mother of this 19 month old I am not keen on him consuming a bag full of candy.

2- If Blake isn't going to eat the candy then guess who will: me. As evidenced by the picture of me in this post, the last thing I need is a bag full of candy.

3- If we knew a lot of our neighbors or knew a group of people who were going trick-or-treating then I'd probably be up for tagging along. But we don't. So we aren't.

4- Blake won't remember hanging out at home on his second Halloween, so I don't feel too bad about not going.

the cutest little ghost

2011-10-26T12:55:00.000-04:00

Halloween came early this year.

And Christmas, apparently.

little helper

2011-10-24T13:58:00.000-04:00

This is what happens

2011-10-19T08:00:00.000-04:00

when I turn my back for one second. (Ok more like 1 minute.)

Fall is here.

2011-10-17T08:00:00.000-04:00

Welcome back, fall. We missed you!

antidote

2011-10-14T08:00:00.000-04:00

Having a bad day? Feeling like a loser because you haven't showered and it's noon? About to pull your hair out because your toddler only took a 45 minute nap? Well I have just the thing for you!

The antidote to a bad day, if you will.

Homemade.Cinnamon.Rolls.

Oh yes.

Find the recipe here.

I don't profess to be an expert on making dough, kneading, or using dry active yeast in general. The last time I tried to make a loaf of bread, the finished product weighed about 5 lbs. But, these cinnamon rolls are delicious and not too difficult to make. Heck, I used a sippy cup as a rolling pin and didn't have enough ground cinnamon and they were still delicious. Essentially, if I can make these, you can too! (Don't plan on whipping these up in 30 minutes though...)

Warning: This antidote must only be taken in small doses. If you eat 3 or 4 cinnamon rolls you risk having a different sort of bad day. The kind of bad day where you feel like a lump of lard for eating 3 or 4 cinnamon rolls.

just another day at the playground

2011-10-12T08:00:00.000-04:00

"Yo!"

Angry girlfriend continues walking.

"Yoooo!"

Angry girlfriend throws something in the street.

"Yoooooo, Dahlene (Darlene, but with a Brooklyn accent.)

Angry girlfriend turns around, then keeps walking.

"Yo, Dahlene, hold up! I'm not gonna call you no more!"

"Dahlene, hold the (expletive) up! Yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

Darlene: What do you want? Leave me alone!

"Yo, Dahlene, yo."

Darlene and boyfriend walk away, yelling at each other.

Ten minutes later they return, holding hands.

How sweet.

dance moves

2011-10-10T08:00:00.000-04:00

The "hold and bounce" move

The "I used to be able to dance, but now I'm a mom" move

The "point to a random object" move

The "I'm gettin' my groove back" move

What's that? You want to see outtakes from our dance party?

"Blake, come over here so I'm not the only one in the pictures!"

"Raffi's my favorite!"

When Blake grows up...

2011-10-07T08:00:00.000-04:00

He might be a(n):

couch potato

mechanic

street sweeper

old man who is finicky about the cleanliness of his porch (ok that was a stretch.)

body builder

tight rope walker

soil scientist (totally a real thing)

bird watcher

wrench eater?

daredevil

Down South

2011-10-05T08:00:00.000-04:00

Some people would say Virginia isn't the south. Well, you can tell that to the guy down the street from my childhood home who proudly flies his confederate flag.

Anyway, I was able to visit my family recently and even though it was great to see them, it was even better seeing these guys:

source

(Cul-de-sac- in case you were confused...)

(Central air)

I kid! Kind of.

We started our trip with a nice barf session in the back of the car service car we took to the airport. Then I stood on the curb at JFK trying to clean Blake's car seat while he stood there in his diaper. Good times with Sir Barfs-A-Lot.

Blake slept the whole flight to VA which kind of made up for the ride to the airport. We made a quick pit stop at Cafe Rio in Manassas, VA. Totally worth it even though it was a little out of the way.

Then we spent a week and a half playing in the 'burbs! We visited the children's museum and drove to groceries stores! And parked and went in and bought groceries! And then put them in our car and drove home and parked in a driveway! It was amazing.

Most of our time was spent hanging out with my family. And it was divine.

Who knew ice packs could be so fun?

Children's Museum- Yes, I'm holding Blake. Yes, he's heavy.

Raaaaaaaaaaaar!

He tried to eat some of the rubber bits. Of course.

Woohoooooooo!

New friends

A "bup" (aka bus).

Broom ball with Papa!

We had a wonderful time. (Even though Blake woke up at 4am every morning. He'd slap my mattress, signaling he was ready to get in bed with me, roll around, kick me in the face, go back to sleep, and wake up at 7:30.) Can't wait to go back!

5 reasons why I'm switching dentists

2011-10-03T08:00:00.000-04:00

1. Your office name, Gentle Dental, is deceiving. Never bled that much after a cleaning...ever.

2. Although you and your staff speak English, your accent makes most of what you say incredibly hard to decipher. And I hate just nodding my head like I've understood what you've said so you won't have to repeat yourself a third time.

3. I don't take kindly to being reprimanded for not flossing my teeth twice a day. And the whole, "Do you floss once a year?" comment was incredibly unnecessary. I'm never going to floss my teeth twice a day. I can commit to flossing once a day. But that's it.

4. Just because I ask questions doesn't mean I wasn't paying attention. So there was no need for you to stop mid-sentence and say, "Pay attention."

5. The whole, "Your gums are slightly inflamed so we need to see you again in 6 months. And if they're still inflamed I'll be forced to do a deep cleaning," threat ain't gonna work, sister. Cause you certainly will not be touching my teeth ever again.

I'm currently taking suggestions for a good dentist in Brooklyn.

people

2011-09-29T15:43:00.001-04:00

I just wrote a whole post about how people in Brooklyn are nosy and wacko when it comes to temperature.

And then I deleted it.

Because I realized that no matter where you go you will run into nosy people. And there are probably some people everywhere who are weird about temperature (although I've never really seen this level of wackiness anywhere else).

Basically Dwight Schrute said it best when he said, "Why are all these people here? There are too many people on this earth. We need a new plague…"

Some days I couldn't agree more.

Good Morning

2011-09-27T12:54:00.000-04:00

1 am-Blake starts to cry so I go in and replace his pacifier. I fear the day we take it away for good...

4 am-Blake wakes up again. Bink replaced. Again.

4:30 am-It's never good when a headache wakes you up. I decide to try to sleep it off.

5 am-Evan gets ready for the day. Which means I'm awake until he leaves at 5:30. Headache is still hanging around. Pop 2 Excedrin and pray it kicks in soon.

5:30 am- Blake's awake. I put him in bed with me and say the mom chant: please go to sleep, please go to sleep, please go to sleep...

6:30 am- I carefully move a sleeping Blake to the center of my bed so I can go lock the front door. I distinctly remember NOT hearing the door lock when Evan left. And even though someone would have to unlock the outside door in order to get to our front door, I can't stop imagining someone holding my neighbor at gunpoint, forcing him to unlock the outer door, then looking at our front door and thinking, "Hmmmm, I wonder if this is unlocked?" So I got up and locked it.

8 am- Blake's up for the day. Breakfast, "Melmo", and Curious George!

8:30 am- Red-faced and whimpering, Blake's having a hard time...moving his bowels. So I assume the squat-and-poop position and start coaching him on the art of pooping. "Push Blake. Just like Mommy! You can do it! Puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuush!" I think I'm qualified to be a labor coach or something now.

9 am- Still a clean diaper. I figure he'll poop at he most inopportune time: while the doctor is checking to make sure he's healthy at his 18 month appointment.

9:20 am- Poopy diaper! I ask Blake if he wants his diaper changed. He waved me off and shook his head no. I figured I could give him another 10 minutes in case he wasn't done. And I'd get to dry my hair.

9:30 am- Blake finds me in the bathroom drying my hair. He holds out his hands the way he does when he gets dirt or food on them and wants them to be cleaned. Only it's not dirt or food. It's poop. I pick him up and notice his diaper has become detached from his body.

9:35 am- Blake's cleaned up and the missing diaper is retrieved and disposed of. Sniff test of the living room to find out what has poop on it and what doesn't. All clear.

9:40 am- Leave for the doctor's office.

Luckily the Excedrin started working about 15 minutes after I took it, so my sleepless and poopy morning was a little easier to handle.

Blake's 18 month stats:

Weight: 25 lbs-50th percentile

Height: 33 in-75th percentile

Head: 48 cm- 95th percentile

Essentially he's tall and skinny with a big head. Well, he doesn't really look like he has a big head. In fact, if his head was smaller I think he'd look a little disproportionate!

2 shots in the bum and he was good to go!

motherhood

2011-09-15T13:05:00.000-04:00

Need I say more?

Seeing New York-Fort Greene Park

2011-09-09T08:00:00.000-04:00

On a recent trip to Target, I decided that I'd make the most of being out and find a park nearby to take Blake. Luckily Fort Greene Park wasn't too far so after making our purchases we set out to find what it had to offer.

ramps

slides

screaming kids

Dad

baby legs

giving up

2011-09-07T05:00:00.000-04:00

I fight the battle everyday.

Inevitably Blake wanders toward our TV stand, opens the drawer, and begins removing all of our dvds and cds. And usually I try to teach him not to do that and redirect his attention.

Except today.

Today I gave up.

And in all honesty it's not Blake's fault that everyday he tries to take everything out of those drawers. They're pretty enticing to a 17 month old. I should probably get those cabinet locks so he'll just leave them alone. I just find those locks incredibly annoying. Maybe we could devote one of those drawers to some of his toys or something.

I don't know. All I know is that some days I just give up on things like that.

Also, this is one of the goofiest pictures I have of Blake. And I love it.

Just when you thought he couldn't get any cuter...

2011-09-05T08:00:00.001-04:00

he goes and puts on a baby tux.

last night

2011-09-02T08:00:00.004-04:00

Evan got home pretty late tonight.

It was just Blake and me.

Blake, who used to go to bed so nicely but ever since we returned from our trip to the west coast has had a rough time going to sleep, and me.

Blake, who jumps in his crib, throws his pacifier over the side, and then cries until someone comes in and gets it for him, and me.

Blake and me, the person who likes her "me time" at the end of the day.

Blake and me, the person who forgot that when you're a mom your time is not your own anymore.

So I caved. I went in and rocked him for a while.

And it was nice. The apartment was dark and quiet.

It was nice.

Just Blake and me.

Growing

2011-08-31T08:00:00.000-04:00

When did this baby:

become this baby:

I'm not a fan of this growing up thing.

The aftermath

2011-08-29T08:00:00.001-04:00

You may have heard about that little hurricane named Irene. After a few days of intense news coverage, she made landfall at Coney Island. We were prepared with food, water, flashlights, candles, and our emergency backpack in case we needed to pick up and go. But we really wouldn't have been able to go far since mass transit was shut down. Despite our extensive preparation, nothing could have prepared us for the aftermath.

As I was sitting in a chair in our family room, a gust of wind blew my granola bar wrapper onto the seat cushion, emptying the contents of the bag.

Little crumbly bits everywhere. And of course as I try to clean it up, those little bits just fall down beside the cushion.

We're doing well. No one was injured during Irene's wrath. We're just trying to pick up the pieces.

(I hope no one takes offense to me making light of Hurricane Irene. I know there are casualties and lots of damage because of this storm. But after so much news coverage and little damage on my street, I knew something bad had to happen. We really are lucky that this was the extent of our misfortune.)

learning

2011-08-26T15:59:00.000-04:00

Just when I thought I knew how to manage life with a 17 month old, reality, that cruel mistress, slapped me in the face.

I should have known. I was foolish to think a trip with a toddler would go smoothly.

Day 1 in California: Blake throws up when the plane lands after a 5 and a half hour flight. Then again in our friend's car on the way to Evan's house. Then a third time in the car. And a fourth time once we get to the house.

Day 3 in California: Blake throws up in the car on the way to this. Needless to say we turn around and head for home. Unfortunately that means our friends who are riding with us don't get to go either. Oh, did I mention these are the same friends that picked us up from the airport? Ya.

Day 4 in California: Date night with Evan and airport pickup friends. Apparently Blake cries forever before he falls asleep.

Day 6 in California: The airport pickup friend watches my barf-tastic son for 6 hours. Oh, did I mention she has a 2 and a half year old? Ya.

Evan's brother gets married in a beautiful ceremony here.

Texts from concerned friends and family about the east coast earthquake while I'm in the middle of earthquake-ville.

Functioning on a 40 minute nap, Blake does pretty well at his first wedding reception. We duck out early, get a ride home from our friends who have seen way too much of the contents of my child's stomach only to find that the front door is locked. The front door that I was positive would be unlocked is locked. A few phone calls and swear words later, I manage to make way through a dark garage and find an unlocked door. Bath time and stories follow, and then Blake drifts off to dreamland and I start some laundry so we can return home with only few dirty clothes.

Rehearsal dinner. No vomiting. Cute dress.

Day 7 in California: We board the plane and Blake refuses to take a nap despite being exhausted. After 2 hours of trying to get him to fall asleep, he finally lays down on my arm and goes to sleep for the remainder of the flight. No barf this time. Thank goodness.

On our way home, in true New York City subway fashion, the train we need isn't stopping at the station at which we happen to be, so we have to figure out a different route home. After a ridiculous amount of stairs to walk down (stupid 4th Ave-9th St station), we get on the train that will take us within 2 blocks of home. But not before seeing a sleeping man stretched out along a seat on the train with his hand down his pants.

Welcome back to reality...and to Brooklyn.

(I promise there were some fun, non-barfing moments on our trip to CA. I'll save that post for another day.)

yoga...toddler style

2011-08-24T08:00:00.004-04:00

I can promise you he doesn't get his yoga abilities from me.

Seeing New York- Central Park Zoo

2011-08-22T08:00:00.007-04:00

What's better than going to the Central Park Zoo on a Monday? Getting to go for free! My friend Ashley invited Blake and I to go with her and her daughter to see the sea lions and penguins (among other animals) at the Central Park Zoo.

The last time we were in Central Park, we passed by the zoo and Evan and I tried to walk in with no tickets. We weren't trying to sneak in. We just didn't know you needed tickets. Of course we were promptly stopped and pointed in the direction of the ticket booth, but after finding out admission wasn't free, we passed on a trip to the zoo.

We started out at the sea lion tank and watched them put on a little show. Blake seemed to enjoy it but was just as intrigued by the random bird or 2 that would fly by.

Next we went to see the penguins and puffins. Blake loved watching the penguins zoom by as they swam under water.

Then it was on to the snow leopard, but apparently he was on vacation somewhere. We did get to see half of a polar bear. It totally could have been a stuffed polar bear and we would have been none the wiser.

Can you spot the polar bear?

And then we entered the tropic zone...

The birds would hop up on the railing and fly around the exhibit. Blake was adamant about touching this Victoria Crowned Pigeon, but I was afraid it would turn around and eat him. Or at least bite him. He wasn't too happy when he didn't get to chase it down and touch it.

After that we headed up to the children's zoo for a few more adventures. Blake had fun playing in the giant turtle eggs and running through the logs.

To end our trip, we hung out with the goats. Blake was almost brave enough to touch them, but each time his finger came within an inch of their mouths, he'd pull away and laugh. I was okay with him not letting the goats nibble on his finger.

We had a great time at the zoo! They even let me take home a monkey.

Someday

2011-08-19T08:00:00.001-04:00

Someday this will be my moving truck.

Good ol' days...

2011-08-17T08:00:00.003-04:00

Remember the good ol' days? You know, the days when you could sit on the ground with your legs crossed without one of your legs going numb?

Man, those were the days.

Seeing New York- Coney Island revisited

2011-08-15T08:00:00.001-04:00

The last time we went to Coney Island was on Memorial Day. After that trip, I secretly swore off Coney Island.

But after going with our playgroup and seeing that it's not really that crowded on a normal day, I figured we could do another family outing to the beach.

Blake likes to help carry our recyclables outside. He'll do anything to get outside.

I was a little worried there would be a lot of people since it was a Saturday, but we got to the beach around 10:30 and it wasn't super crowded. We walked a little ways down the boardwalk and found a nice little spot close to the water.

Apparently I was asleep during this photo op. Also, holy farmer's tan!

This time around, Blake actually played closer to the water and held his own against the waves!

Checkin' out the ladies...or a bird.

We took him out past where the waves were breaking. He was a good sport, but let us know when he was ready to head in.

So I've learned my lesson. Coney Island on Memorial Day=don't even think about it. Coney Island in the morning on a normal day, including Saturday=awesome!

Post-beach nap

Ruffles? What was I thinking?

2011-08-12T08:00:00.005-04:00

I'm done. My search for a swimsuit that fits well and provides the coverage I need is over. At least for this season.

I scoured the Internet looking for an acceptable swimsuit. I thought I had found one. And I was pretty confident because the description of the swimsuit said it was suited for the well-endowed.

But only if you wanted to look bigger than you already are.

I thought the ruffles might accentuate the part of my body I don't really need accentuated. But it was 10 o'clock at night and I thought I had found the solution to my problem.

I was excited when I got the package in the mail. I was even feeling pretty good when I tried it on.

But when I skyped with my sister and modeled it for her (I know what you're thinking. Wasn't it awkward to video chat in a swimsuit? Yes, yes it was.) we both concluded that while the swimsuit was cute, for $74 it needed to be almost perfect for me to keep. Oh, and the circulation to my legs was being cut off after about 10 minutes of wearing it. It will be returned.

I found another swimsuit that is comfortable and provides a little more coverage than the halter top tankini I currently wear to most water-related activities. And it was significantly less expensive than the $74 we-think-ruffles-will-downplay-your-large-chest swimsuit.

But it still doesn't provide the type of coverage I would really like. I'm looking for next to no "cleave" here, people. Chasing a toddler when you don't feel covered up or like you could fall out of your swimsuit is not my idea of summer fun. But, I just don't care anymore. When I find a suit that covers, it doesn't fit somewhere else. When I find a suit that fits somewhere else, it doesn't cover the girls.

So I'm done.

Seeing New York-Serendipity 3

2011-08-10T08:00:00.000-04:00

When my sister came to visit a few months ago, I knew I wanted to go to Serendipity 3 to try their Golden Opulence Sundae which costs $1000. Kidding. I wanted to try the more affordable frozen hot chocolate. I read on their website that they don't accommodate strollers, so Evan watched Blake so Tori and I could go.

Before we got to Serendipity, we stopped at Dylan's Candy Bar and had a little fun drooling over all the candy. And candy accessories.

After a few purchases at Dylan's Candy Bar, we headed to Serendipity 3. And waited an hour to be seated.

We were finally seated and looked over their desserts just to make sure we wanted the frozen hot chocolate.

It was pretty good! After a while though, it was sickeningly sweet. If I ever go back, I will definitely be getting their Forbidden Broadway Sundae. It looked divine!

Just some things to know before you go:

They don't take reservations if you are going for dessert only. So have them take your name and then walk around the area because there will most likely be a wait.

They don't accommodate strollers in the restaurant area. I don't know if that means you'd have to leave your stroller outside or if they have place for them. I'm guessing they don't have a place for them.

There is a minimum purchase amount for each person. They seemed lenient on it though when the couple we were with ordered the Forbidden Broadway Sundae to share.

I shoulda been...

2011-08-08T08:00:00.006-04:00

-a doctor so I could examine my son and determine if he really is sick, then write a prescription if needed

-a chef so I could make nutritious and delicious meals for my family and enjoy doing it

-a photographer so I could capture amazing photographs of my family

-a computer programmer so I could fix any technological problem that arises

-a nutritionist so I would know how our bodies process foods

-a personal trainer so I would know what exercises to do to get rid of these jiggly arms (and hips, and thighs...)

-a writer so I could have an amazing blog that thousands of people would read and I could make money off of it

-a mathematician so when Blake reaches high school I won't have to tell him I never really learned how to do proofs

But I'm a mom.

And I can live with that.

get over it? how?

2011-08-05T08:00:00.012-04:00

I came to the realization recently that I was traumatized by the birth of my son. I didn't plan on having a c-section, but I wasn't really surprised when my doctor suggested I'd need one. I was a week past my due date and I had zero signs of labor. No contractions, no baby dropping, no nothing.

And when I look back on my experience with labor, I kind of resent it. As silly as it sounds, I feel sad that I didn't get to have the kind of birth that I thought I wanted. Well, that's not true. I don't think I had a clue what I wanted. All I wanted was a healthy baby. And that's what I got, so why am I so scarred by the events that took place?

As I delve deeper into my memory of those 12 hours of labor and then being told I'd need a c-section, I start to relive some of the things I was feeling:

-not in control: As soon as I agreed to a c-section I was given forms to sign, Evan was taken to be prepped for surgery, and I was told about the slight chance that I'd feel pain when they started to make the incision

-head-spinning: Everything happened so quickly. One minute I was laying in the hospital bed exhausted from a day of labor, listening to Blake's heartbeat decline with each contraction and then increase, and the next minute I was being wheeled into the operating room and told to try to move myself to the operating table.

-scared: I wanted desperately to call my mom when my doctor told me I would need a c-section. But I felt like there wasn't time and that if I got on the phone I'd immediately start crying. And I distinctly remember not wanting my doctor to see me cry. That seems so silly since he was going to cut me open and see the inside of my uterus. But I wanted to seem ok with being cut open.

-worried: I was worried about Blake's health and my health. And I was also worried that my wedding rings would get lost because the nurse forgot to tell me to take them off before going into the operating room.

-pain: After my c-section, my epidural catheter was removed before I received any pain medication. I was on a high from being able to see my little baby, but soon after that I was in the worst pain I'd ever experienced. Just imagine being able to feel the pain from a fresh incision in your skin AND your insides. It was horrible. So horrible that all I remember doing is squeezing Evan's hand, screaming at the nurse when she would push on my stomach, and asking for the pain to go away.

-relief: Finally I was given a strong enough pain medication and the pain subsided. And then I got to hold my baby.

But that relief wasn't enough to wash away all those awful feelings I had before I got to hold Blake. And when I think about having another baby, a lot of those awful feelings come back. And sometimes I can even feel a slight twinge of pain in the "beautiful" scar I get to wear for the rest of my life.

I feel like having a c-section has taken away my choice when it comes to how I want to have more children. I mean, I do have choices. But I guess I don't really like my choices. VBAC? Possible, but there are risks. Scheduled c-section? Probably easier, but then there's the issue of scar tissue and the risks associated with that.

And then there's the recovery. The recovery from my c-section was very long and painful. I've heard that c-section recovery gets easier with each one. But I can still remember not being able to stand up completely because the pain was too much to bear.

I feel like I should get over the fact that I had a c-section, not let it effect my decisions the way it has. But the memory of everything is still fresh, even after 16 months.

With such a traumatizing experience pre and post delivery, I feel just as traumatized by the memory of being a new mother. The sleepless nights, the pure exhaustion, the frustration, the needing help but refusing to ask for it, the night that still haunts me when I grabbed a piece of paper as Blake was screaming in his cradle and scribbled down how I wasn't cut out for motherhood and how I had made a horrible mistake, or the night I prayed for Blake to stop crying until he actually did stop crying. It all seems so dramatic now. My emotions were out of control and I hated it. Evan wasn't around to experience my postpartum mood swings. And I don't think any amount of explaining will prepare him for them when we have a second child.

I suppose that if I'm feeling apprehensive about having another child then I'm not ready mentally for it. And that's ok. Every once in a while I kind of check in with myself and think about whether it's time to "expand our family". I do wonder when the memory of my c-section, memories of being a new mom, and the apprehension of life in Brooklyn with 2 kids will be outweighed by the excitement and readiness to have baby #2. For now, I'll just focus on not-a-baby-anymore #1.

Not surprised

2011-08-03T08:00:00.005-04:00

I am not surprised by this video for several reasons:

1) IT'S A GREAT WHITE SHARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRK!

Ok, that's the only reason I'm not surprised this shark burst through the cage.

Here are some facts about great white sharks in case you don't know much about them:

So children, what did we learn from this little blog post? Any animal whose size is comparable to a school bus is capable of pretty much whatever it wants to be capable of. Also, don't swim with sharks.

Adventures with a 1 year old- Finger Painting

2011-08-01T08:00:00.006-04:00

Lately I feel like I've been a lazy mom. I've lacked the motivation to take Blake to the playground because at the time of this post, we are experiencing a heat wave. And after a few days of being inside, playing with the same toys, the same games, the same books, we were ready for something new. I read that at 16 months, toddlers might enjoy scribbling with crayons. Obviously at this age Blake won't be able to sit quietly and color. In fact, sitting is never involved in anything he does except eating.

I took out some crayons and paper for him to play with the other day while I was making dinner. He spent about 2 minutes scribbling and then ran off with the crayons. Not wanting to scrub the walls of stray crayon marks, I chased him down and the crayons haven't been out since. I wasn't surprised at how our adventure with crayons went and his art work is even hanging on our fridge now.

Trying to break free of this bout of laziness, I decided finger painting would be fun to try with Blake. But with Blake's habit of tasting everything, I knew I didn't want to use actual paint. I saw a "recipe" for home made finger paint made with flour, water, and food coloring and whipped up 5 different colors for Blake to use.

I used small ziploc containers to mix the ingredients. I didn't really measure anything. I just added water or flour to get the consistency I wanted. Then I used a 9x13 pan to store all the materials we'd need. (paint, bowl of water and baby wipes for cleaning up). Then we headed outside to paint!

Instead of a paintbrush (because we don't have one), I gave Blake a wooden spoon to use.

We used the wooden spoon, a stick, a leaf, and our fingers to paint. Blake tasted the finger paint a few times, but I didn't have to freak out because I knew it wouldn't hurt him.

Overall, I think our finger painting experience went pretty well! It's definitely an activity I'll do with him again in the future.

It started to rain while we were painting, but we opted to stay outside and play. We usually walk a half mile to a playground to play in the sprinklers, so why not take advantage of nature's sprinklers, right?

Losing it*

2011-07-30T08:00:00.003-04:00

This is what I feel like doing right now. And after I kill my computer, I'm going to point that gun at my printer, because they are both annoying me today.

I don't know what I did. The printer isn't working. It says it's connected. It says it's supposed to work. But it's not. And I don't have the patience or the time to deal with it. So, I'm just going to destroy the computer and then the printer. They aren't working the way I need them to anyway, so it won't be any different. I might not be blogging for a while. You know, cause I shot my computer and all.

*And wouldn't you know, 24 hours after posting this, our computer crashed. I'd take the stupid non-working printer over potentially losing all of our pictures and videos of Blake from birth to present day. I feel too defeated to even cry.

Seeing New York-in a car

2011-07-29T08:00:00.001-04:00

Last Saturday we rented a car and took a little trip to Bloomington, New York for Evan's company picnic. And I can't tell you how nice it felt to leave the city. I felt like I could breathe again!

Evan picked up the rental car Saturday morning while I got Blake ready and packed snacks, toys, and books for the trip. Blake is only in a car seat a few times a year, so I never really know what to expect when he's strapped in for more than 20 minutes.

Evan and I were worried that we would get lost since neither one of us have driven around NYC, but we actually did really well. We took a few wrong turns, but managed to make our way to our destination.

One wrong turn took us right alongside Ground Zero. I looked out the window and said, "I think this is where the Twin Towers used to be. Huh, isn't that crazy?" Because I know so little about where things are in NYC, I think it's funny when we just happen to stumble upon something like Ground Zero or the Wall Street Bull (which we also "stumbled upon" while driving.)

It felt so amazing to not be surrounded by buildings and to see rolling hills of green once we got out of the city.

Blake did really well in his car seat. He fell asleep on the way there and back. But not without expressing his opinion on being in his car seat.

shaking his head "no"

We had a really fun time hanging out with the people Evan works with and their families. And we were pretty impressed with our navigation skills (and wonder what people did before GPS!).

Blake snapped this picture of me while I was sleeping.

and the Mother of the Year Award goes to...

2011-07-27T08:00:00.003-04:00

not me.

Yes, those are Blake's shorts along with his diaper. Apparently his diaper was so full that when he slipped his shorts off, the diaper went with them.

In my defense, I was whipping up a batch of home made finger paints for him to play with and forgot to change his diaper. Don't I get some awesome mom points for that?

cute!

2011-07-25T08:00:00.004-04:00

I love cute food! Well, I love delicious food more because when it comes down to it, I care more about how my food tastes than how it looks.

But these spinach lasagna rolls just looked so cute hanging out in the baking dish.

And with spaghetti sauce and mozzarella all melted on top, they crossed into the "potentially delicious" category. (I was a little disappointed with how they tasted. I like the concept, so I'll have to figure out a different filling.)

Cute and potentially delicious. (and super easy!) Kinda like this guy (minus the super easy some days...):

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2011-07-22T12:29:00.000-04:00

It's too hot outside to blog. What's that? No, I don't blog outside. I blog from my nice, cool living room with the air conditioner pointed right at me. But when I know it feels like 112 degrees outside, it's hard to be motivated to think of things to blog about. Because it's just too hot to do much of anything.

Dear (fill-in-the-blank),

2011-07-21T13:33:00.000-04:00

Dear kitchen,

I can't stand you. You always smell. The only thing I can figure out is that food rots in the trash can at a faster rate because it gets so hot during the day and there is no a/c to cool you down. But frankly, I don't care what your excuse is. I still hate you.

Sincerely,
hating you

Dear 1 hour nap,

You are no longer welcome in my home. Tell your friends 2 and 3 hour nap they are required to be here everyday around noon.

Sincerely,
hate not being able to finish a few chapters in the book I'm reading

Dear amazing apartments in Brooklyn,

Where are you?

Sincerely,
searching

Dear red wine vinegar,

I've done way too much reading about whether you contain alcohol or not. I'm going to use you anyway.

Sincerely,
don't care anymore

Dear TV stand,

You look great!

Sincerely,
Whitney

Dear summer,

2011-07-18T08:00:00.008-04:00

I knew you were back in my life when the temperatures started reaching the low 90's. Then those mornings came when I walked outside and felt like I needed another shower and it wasn't even 10 o'clock yet. I was on to you. You and your high temperatures and ridiculous humidity.

Oh don't you think I've forgotten for a second how miserable we were when you were around last year. Sweating all day and sweating all night. We couldn't even enjoy going outside because there would be no relief when we got home. Just more sweating.

And I'm sure you thought you were going to waltz in again and make life borderline unbearable for a few months. But not this year.

Look, I don't know how to say this. It's just that it's so hard to muster the energy to do anything when you are around making it so uncomfortable inside and out. So...we bought something. Something that you're not gonna like. His name is Ken(wood). And he's amazing.

He arrived a few days ago and there's no chance he's going anywhere. At least not while you're around.

We hang out during nap time.

We laugh together at how ridiculously awesome it feels to be inside our apartment on a blazing hot day.

We goof off a lot, too.

So, I'm sorry summer. I know without you we wouldn't get to go swimming outside or run through the sprinklers at the playground. But I just couldn't be miserable another year. In fact, I think Ken(wood) might have a funny way of bringing us closer together.

Love,

Whitney

dinnertime

2011-07-15T08:00:00.000-04:00

Does this really even need an explanation?

Seeing New York-Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island

2011-07-13T08:00:00.002-04:00

When we first moved to New York City, we didn't really take a lot of time to be tourists. (Unless you count the trip to Baja Fresh at Times Square...)

So when my sister visited a few weeks ago, it was the perfect time to do all the touristy things we hadn't done yet.

Enter Lady Liberty!

We booked our tickets online and headed down to the ferry to go and see the Statue of Liberty. The nice part about seeing the Statue of Liberty is that the tickets include a trip to Ellis Island! So for $13 you can visit Liberty Island AND Ellis Island.

Bye bye Manhattan!

Ferry ride

Hide and seek on Liberty Island

Fun with the Lady!

We only got tickets that allowed us onto Liberty Island so we didn't actually get to go to the pedestal or the crown. But it was really neat to see the Statue of Liberty up close.

Our next stop was Ellis Island.

Blake was clearly done with the trip.

Tori thought she could use her debit card to donate some money. Rejected!

Just making sure no one sneaks in (ahem...Tori)!

This picture was so striking. I couldn't walk away from it.

I actually enjoyed Ellis Island more than I did Liberty Island. It was amazing to see the process of entering the United States and how much people went through. I can't imagine being so close to freedom only to be told you couldn't enter the United States.

After a full day of being tourists, we definitely came home and crashed.

But not before we witnessed this:

I'll take credit for that.

When Life Gives You Lemons...

2011-07-11T08:00:00.002-04:00

goodbye

2011-07-07T08:00:00.014-04:00

Today I said goodbye to a good friend. I met this friend about 6 years ago. We were inseparable for 2 years. We went everywhere together. Then things started to change. We grew apart. I tried my hardest to fit this friend into my life, but other things got in the way.

And today we officially said goodbye. I'll never see this friend again as long as I live.

It's not that I didn't want to be close again. It just seemed pretty impossible.

So, farewell size 8 jeans. We looked so good together. Heck, you're probably one of the reasons my husband asked me out. And as much as I'd love to fit into you again one day, I just don't think it's going to happen. And even if I do someday where a size 8, I know your low rise style is just not going to work with a mommy pooch.

I hope someone else will find you at a Goodwill and enjoy you as much as I did.

confession

2011-07-06T12:08:00.001-04:00

Teacher stuff makes me giddy.

I know, it sounds stupid. And I know I'm not teaching right now. In fact, after my first year of teaching, I wasn't convinced I'd be going back to teach after my children were grown. I thought, "Well, maybe I'll do speech pathology or specialize in something where I can work with a handful of children at a time instead of 31 little monsters who apparently don't know how to FOLLOW DIRECTIONS." (Just kidding about the monsters part...kind of...sometimes.)

But there I was in Target. The dollar spot. I always take a quick peek just to see if they have anything good. And this time they did. Teacher stuff.

As I perused the teacher stuff I was coming up with all sorts of ways I could use it. "Oh, when I set up my classroom expectations and good habits, I could use these signs. I'd hold up the 'look and listen' one after I give my attention signal. And then when recess is over I could hold up the 'line up here' sign. Ohhhh and after a project I would hold up the 'time to clean-up' sign! It will be magical!"

And then I found some cool bookmarks that say, "Read with a friend." I'm sure they are meant to be given away, but as I turned them over in my hand a few times I kept thinking, "I wouldn't give these away. I'd use these as a reward. I'd hand them out to students who were reading quietly and they could pick someone to sit beside while they read. Then I'd collect them at the end of reading time and use them all year. Again, more magic!"

I even showed my husband what I bought when I got home. I immediately launched into an explanation of why I was buying teacher supplies when I in fact am not a teacher. "I couldn't help it. I just love this stuff."

And after buying those few items, I'm almost convinced I will teach again.

I'm sorry

2011-06-30T17:48:00.000-04:00

This is an open letter to all the parents out there that I have wrongly judged over the years. I'd watch your kids be disruptive or even lash out and hit you. And I judged you. I thought, "My kids will never do that."

I judged you because I had no clue what it meant to be a parent. I'm quickly learning that sometimes I don't even know how to be an effective parent. So, I'm done judging. Yes, there are bratty kids out there who probably have parents that struggle to teach them how to behave. But I'd be sad if someone judged my parenting skills based on how Blake sometimes behaves. He's only 15 months old, but he's perfecting the art of tantrums. And despite my best efforts, he's started to hit.

But I'm learning that Blake is learning. He's learning what's right and wrong and I have to be the one to teach him. And I'm in it for the long haul, because I'm realizing it's going to be a long haul. I know what kind of person I want Blake to be. And helping him become that person is going to be made up of lots of mistakes, both on his part and mine.

So I'm sorry. I'm done judging. Now let's all get out there and do our best!

Seeing New York-City Treehouse

2011-06-27T08:00:00.002-04:00

My sister recently stayed with us and accompanied Blake and me on an adventure to City Treehouse. It's an indoor playspace that boasts water tables, a treehouse, a star cave, and a soft toy room. And even though it's too expensive ($10 for your first visit, $20 for every visit after that) for us to be going ~~very often~~ ever again*, it was fun to experience it.

Yea for water tables!

*City Treehouse is actually having a summer special, so we will get to go again!

slightly well visit

2011-06-24T08:00:00.004-04:00

Blake had his 15 month check up yesterday. Well, actually he only had half of his check up. He was weighed (23 pounds, going on 40 I swear) and measured (32 inches), but luckily for him he didn't have to get any shots. Unluckily for him he has to sit on my lap 3 times a day for the next week while I hold a nebulizer under his mouth and nose in order to help break up the bronchitis that has settled in his lungs.

Fun.

When we arrived at the doctor's office I told the receptionist that Blake had a bit of a cold and asked her if we should wait in the sick waiting room even though we were there for a well visit. We proceeded to wait in the sick room while Blake played with Snotty McSnotterson. I won't be surprised if he catches whatever that kid had. I was trying to do the rest of the patients a favor by not letting Blake in the well waiting room. So if Blake caught whatever booger boy had, I'm gonna be annoyed.

I digress. I wasn't worried at all about Blake's cough. He'd had it for a few days and I've had a bit of a sore throat and stuffy nose. Regular cold stuff. And anytime I've been 100% positive Blake was sick and needed medication, I have been 100% wrong and $30 poorer. So I decided I wasn't going to call a 24-hour nurse hotline or his doctor and explain the symptoms. I was just going to ride the cough out and not be the hypochondriac I've been in the past.

And of course the one time I don't freak out, he has bronchitis. I wasn't even concerned when the nurse that weighed and measured Blake started frowning when I said he had a cold. I said, "Oh he just has a wet cough and can't seem to clear anything out." In my mind I was thinking, "It's just a cough, lady." Then Blake's doctor came in and listened to him breathe. I was surprised when she said she wanted to do a nebulizer treatment on Blake and that he wouldn't be getting any shots until he was better.

So what did we learn from this visit, kids? Freak out or don't freak out. It doesn't really matter. Oh, and we now know that our insurance covers a nebulizer machine. That we get to keep. So that's cool. I guess.

I...have a problem

2011-06-23T08:00:00.000-04:00

No, it's not that I eat too many cookies. Well, that is a problem, but I'm talking about another problem.

A few months after I read a book, I can't really remember the details of the story. I can give an extremely brief summary of what happens, but details are lacking.

This bothers me because I feel like I can't talk about books I've read with people. I just end up saying, "I can't really remember the details, but I really liked it." Lame.

Is this normal? I think I'm just not devoting a lot of mental energy to reading these books. And that's probably ok because I have other more important things to devote that energy to (for now).

creative side

2011-06-22T09:00:00.012-04:00

I don't really consider myself a crafty person. I blame it on lack of space. If I had a whole room to devote to being crafty or sewing I think I'd turn out some pretty awesome stuff. On the other hand, if I really loved creating things I wouldn't need a whole room to devote to it. I'd just find the space I needed and craft away.

A few months ago I was reading a friend of a friend's blog and noticed a really cute Christmas decoration that was kind of different than your standard Christmas decorations.

source

Subway art. I had seen other things done in subway art style but never really liked it enough to hang in my home. I saw this one and thought it was really cute. And I had a few apothecary jars I ~~stole in a rousing white elephant gift exchange (I still feel bad about that)~~ got for Christmas one year that I filled with colored Christmas ball ornaments. I didn't print this subway art out until well after Christmas, but I plan to put it up next year along with the jars. (And I may have only recently put the Christmas ornaments that were in said jars away...ahem.)

My goal is to have seasonal subway art and objects to put in the apothecary jars and change them as the seasons change. With the start of summer, I'm on the hunt for some sand to fill the apothecary jars with along with miniature summer-y items. So far I have mini beach balls and a mini sand shovel. I just need one more object and my summer decorations will be done. Except, as I searched for summer subway art, I couldn't fine anything I liked. Most of the results were cute, but not cute enough. So I decided to make my own.

I'm actually pretty happy with the way it turned out. I don't think it's as cute as the Christmas one, but I like it better than anything else I could find. And I feel pretty creative to boot!

Maybe I can start my own etsy shop and sell these for $20 a pop. Ooo and make some headbands and stuff! Or get a really expensive camera and start a photography business. I'm just feeling so creative now!

sensitive subject?

2011-06-21T09:00:00.000-04:00

I was recently reading a woman's blog in which she posted a rant about how she hates when people call her "brave" after informing them she is going to have a home birth. Hmmmm. Really?

She explained that when people call her "brave" what they are really alluding to is their belief that home births are dangerous and that she must be crazy for wanting one.

And maybe some people do feel that way. But maybe other people really do think she is brave. This woman said she's done a lot of research and feels a home birth is the best option for her and her baby. Congratulations! I don't care.

Ok, ok, I mean, it's not like I hope there are complications or something and that her baby has to be rushed to the hospital so someone can say, "Told ya you shoulda had that baby in a hospital." In fact, I hope everything goes really smoothly and that it's a beautiful experience. I even hope that if she has a great experience this time around, she'll do a home birth with all her pregnancies. See, so I do care.

I just don't think she should be so offended when people call her brave. Maybe some people have given her that crazy look, but still, why choose to be offended? (Ok I really don't have room to talk because one time a guy told me my baby was hungry and I was totally offended.)

In conclusion (wait, where did that come from...) I think this woman is brave. In fact, I think all women who give birth are brave. Whether you have your baby in a hospital or at home, whether you have an epidural or go "natural", whether you have to be sliced open or...not, you are brave. You are taking on the challenge of sustaining another life within yourself for 9 months, expelling that life from your body, and then shaping that life for the rest of YOUR life.

And that my friends takes bravery.

Dear (fill-in-the-blank),

2011-06-20T09:00:00.003-04:00

Dear lady who is visiting the people who live above us,

I'm used to being around cigarette smoke because apparently it's the thing to do if you live here. Personally I think it's disgusting and I hate that I have to smell it everywhere I go, even sometimes in my apartment. I saw you sitting on the front porch this morning puffing away. And even though it boggles my mind that people smoke, it's your choice to do so if you desire. But please don't flick your ashes on the porch. My baby plays there and will inevitably be eating those ashes. Go flick them somewhere else.

Sincerely,
trying to breathe clean air

Dear dog owners,

Clean up your dog's poop. If you didn't want to be bending down and picking up your dog's mess then you shouldn't have gotten a dog.

Sincerely,
grossed out

Dear lazy people who throw their trash on the ground,

Seriously? You really can't take the time to find a trash can? You are far too busy to expend the mental and physical energy to throw YOUR trash into a trash receptacle? Well then I think you're a piece of trash and wish I could throw you away.

Sincerely,
tired of picking up garbage so my child doesn't play with it

Dear bossy kids at the playground,

If your parents couldn't hear me I would say something really mean to you. Instead I'm just going to give you the meanest look I can muster and ignore you telling my child he can't play on the slide.

Sincerely,
not looking forward to summer days at the playground with annoying kids

It was going so well...

2011-06-17T11:18:00.002-04:00

until I made the final cut.

It's taken a while for Blake to grow the hair he has now. And after 14 months of growing it, he has a few wildly long strands that hang over his ears and a weird rat tail/mullet thing going on in the back. Because he really doesn't have enough hair to warrant a hair cut from someone who would charge me money for a few snips, I took matters into my own hands.

I figured there was no better time to cut his hair than when he was standing by our window, distracted by passing cars. The sunlight illuminated the long hairs that needed to be trimmed. I took my scissors and tried to trim them without impaling my son. He of course whipped his head around anytime I got close to his head making the experience quite terrifying (for me). I made the first few cuts and it actually looked good. I don't know anything about cutting hair, so I was impressed with myself when the right side of his head looked normal, just a tad bit shorter.

Not too shabby!

Then I tried the left side. Blake wasn't having any of that, so I went to the back of his head. I figured that part would be easiest because it's a little tuft of hair that I could lop off without worrying that it would look bad.

With a new found confidence in hair cutting, I attempted the left side again. I took advantage of Blake being still while the recycling truck passed and made a clean cut. A little too clean.

oops...

I knew as soon as I had cut it that I had done it all wrong...and way too short. I hope it doesn't take another 14 months for his hair to look normal. As long as I hold him with his left side facing me, no one should be able to tell, right?

new words

2011-06-16T16:52:00.001-04:00

In addition to these words, Blake has picked up a few more:

up-This word is probably the clearest he can say besides Mama and Dada.

go- usually said as he looks out the window or while throwing a fit because he wants to go outside

dog-sounds like "dah...g" when he says it

Nana- in reference to his great-grandmother or a banana. natch.

no- The dreaded "no". I try to counter it with lots of yeses. <------ that looks weird...

juice- Well, we're still working on this one. So far Blake makes the "j" sound for juice. Eh, close enough.

cold- Whenever Blake touches something cold he says, "cole" with a cute o-shaped mouth.

hot- Sometimes Blake says "cole" when he touches something that is hot. He also blows on almost everything he eats whether it's hot or cold. And just today he held a piece of food up to my mouth for me blow on to cool it off. I mistakenly tried to eat it.

It really is incredible how quickly he's learning how to say new words and how much he understands. Today I told him he was going downstairs to play with our neighbor's son. He immediately ran to the door and started crying when we didn't leave right away. I didn't know he actually understood what I meant! He also walks straight to the kitchen when I tell him it's time for a snack. And he's even potty trained now! Ok not really. But man that would be awesome.

Time Out

2011-06-15T08:00:00.001-04:00

Meltdown mode will commence in 3...2...1...

I think Blake wanted to watch videos of himself on the computer and I didn't want to. I probably could have just sat at the computer for another 15 minutes, but we had already watched videos earlier that morning and I wanted to take him to the park before it got too hot.

Apparently he didn't like that idea. So a full-on tantrum was in order. I tried to ignore it. I tried to say things like, "I know you want to watch videos of yourself, but let's go to the park! Can you find your shoes?" I tried getting ready to go outside, but the tantrum continued. I thought it would help if I just got him dressed and in his stroller. Usually once we are outside he gets distracted and he's back to his happy self.

But then I could smell the trash. Ugh, the trash needed to be taken out. Couldn't I just do it when we got back from the park? I suppose. But then as soon as we walked into the apartment we'd be knocked over by the smell of whatever was rotting in our trash. And I knew we were going to be hot and sweaty when we came back. The thought of sweating and smelling rotting trash wasn't so appealing. So I proceed to get the trash ready to take outside.

Enter Angry Blake.

Angry Blake, the early years

(This is the only crying picture I have of Blake. No one takes pictures of their kid's tantrums!)

Taking out the trash is a relatively easy, although loathsome, task. But it's anything but easy and 10 times more loathsome when Angry Blake is around. He was already upset because I wouldn't let him do what he wanted to do. So he decided to do everything I didn't want him to do. Like play with the dustpan. Or the trashcan lid. I could feel my sanity slipping away. I needed a time out. He needed a time out. THE WHOLE WORLD NEEDED A TIME OUT!

Blake is only 14 months old, so I don't generally handle his tantrums with time-outs. I try to distract him with something else, explain why he can't do something or why I need him to do something (like wear a diaper), and give him lots of love after he's calmed down. But this tantrum was getting out of control and I didn't feel like I could deal with it in an appropriate way.

So I put Blake in his crib with his blanket and pacifier and turned off the lights. There was no crying. He laid down and in a few minutes I could hear him laughing. At that point I was ready to get him and take him to the park. And we had a blast! (Although seriously how hard is it to throw your trash away, people! There are trashcans all over the playground for you to use!)

Regular Blake

I don't know why, but I've never been a fan of time-outs. Maybe it's because when I've seen them used they don't seem to work. I'm not opposed to using something if it works. But I don't think I'll be using time outs on a regular basis because I feel like Blake is still too young to understand why he's getting a time out. For now I'll reserve them for the times when we both need a few minutes to calm down.

Just curious, do you use time outs and how early did you start? Do you feel like they are effective?

1 year

2011-06-13T08:00:00.000-04:00

1 year ago today, Blake looked like this:

Evan looked like this:

And I looked like this:

1 year ago today, Blake and I started our adventure in Brooklyn. I was naive. I knew life would be different, but the New York I was picturing was not the New York I would come to know. A few days ago I was standing in my kitchen washing dishes and I thought to myself, "I've finally decided that I hate it here."

Over the past year I've tried really hard to love Brooklyn and NYC as a whole. And while I haven't seen all of NYC, I can definitely say I do not love this place. And some days I really do hate it. And other days I don't hate it as much. And still other days I don't mind it and think it's not so bad. So how do I feel about New York? Well, I've decided it's an awesome place to visit, but not such an awesome place to live. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with my life. As difficult as it is to admit, I do believe that one's circumstances don't determine the level of one's happiness. (Sometimes I have to repeat that to myself several times a day...)

Some days I feel like I'm still "new" here. I don't feel like I have mastered city life. But I don't know if I'll ever feel that way (and I don't really want to be here long enough to.) And even though if I could choose to live anywhere it wouldn't be here, I do feel that Brooklyn has taught me a few things:

1) I can do hard things (such as lugging a 25+ lb baby in a 9lb stroller up and down subway stairs...or running to catch the train with that same baby in the same stroller.)

2) Target is not the same everywhere.

3) I should probably learn Spanish...or Chinese...or Russian...

4) It's ok to display good manners when they seem to be in short supply.

5) I'm glad I don't have a Brooklyn accent but chuckle when I hear people speak who do. (And then laugh at myself when I try to imitate them.)

6) The church is the same anywhere you go (well, kind of.)

7) The pizza here is pretty good. ;)

Who knew a year ago that Blake would look like this:

Evan would look like this:

And I would look like this:

Oops! I mean this:

Ahh, much better.

Here's to another year in Brooklyn!

40

2011-06-10T19:18:00.002-04:00

That's how many marathons a person would have to run in order to burn 30 pounds of fat.

Or at least that's what someone told me yesterday. I'm not really sure why she told me that. Maybe she thinks I have about 30 pounds of fat to burn. And she's probably not that far off. I think she was trying to prove how it's more effective to alter one's diet than to start a rigorous work out plan. But then she started talking about how important working out is. I was confused. And she probably weighed about 2.3 pounds so I stopped acting like I was interested in her conversation and tended to my little one.

But with a number like that, 40 marathons, it doesn't make me want to start training for one. It makes me want to go eat a cookie or something. 40 marathons?! I'll count my life accomplished if I ever have the desire to start thinking about running 1 marathon.

This lady was a health coach. I'm not sure what that means.

Apparently it means I need to run 40 marathons.

not that kind of blog

2011-06-08T15:04:00.000-04:00

You know those blogs, the ones with the cute moms who are really stylish and crafty and make their own bread and stuff?

Ya this isn't one of those blogs. I'm not stylish. In fact, I hate shopping. I get tired easily and these days things just don't fit me like I want them to. I think I could be really stylish, but I'm not willing to put the energy into it. That's sad. Anyway, I can be crafty when needed. I've made bread before. It turned out ok.

But this isn't one of those blogs. Maybe one day I'll find something I'm awesome at doing and can write about it on my blog. Then I'll have thousands of people following my blog, asking me to teach them to be as awesome as I am.

Until then, I'll just leave you with photo evidence of why this isn't one of those blogs.

whiter than white

2011-06-03T12:03:00.000-04:00

Look at those legs. Mine, not Blake's.

Can you tell they haven't seen the sun in...a while?

White? No, not white.

Translucent.

bye bye baby

2011-06-01T09:00:00.003-04:00

14 months old and almost no sign of a baby left.

(I wish I could say that about my hips...haha!)

Seeing New York-Coney Island

2011-05-31T12:41:00.000-04:00

I've decided I don't like crowds.

Actually, I don't like crowds when I have a baby in tow. So visiting Coney Island on Memorial Day probably wasn't the best idea I've ever had. Well at least that's what I thought when I snapped this picture. But seeing as how pretty much anywhere worth going in NYC is going to be crowded, I can't let a few thousand half naked people stop me from enjoying all this place has to offer.

Once we got to the boardwalk, we strolled down to the New York Aquarium. It was my goal to keep Blake out of the sun as much as possible because our essentially bald baby refuses to wear a hat and with one bout of heat rash behind us, the heat and direct sunlight worry me when it comes to Blake.

At first I thought the tickets to the aquarium were a little steep ($14.95 for adults, probably $10 for kids. I can't remember exactly, but it didn't cost anything for Blake. Oh, and Fridays after 3pm are pay-what-you-wish!). But afterwards I thought it was well worth the price to see Blake mesmerized by everything.

Apparently I was a little mesmerized too.

We were able to catch the last live sea animal show of the day which was a lot of fun!

Jellies!

Blake even got to high five a walrus!

After our visit to the aquarium, we made our way down to the beach.

And of course Blake had to stop and play with the guys.

Oh and did I mention Tori tagged along for this little adventure?

We didn't really do much else at Coney Island and there is so much more to do! Chances are we'll be visiting Coney Island again in the near future. Maybe next time we'll get a hot dog from Nathan's!

Adventures with a 1 year old- Poop...yes poop

2011-05-27T09:00:00.000-04:00

This adventure actually starts out with a bout of heat rash. I took Blake to the playground one morning around 9:30 and made the mistake of putting him in sweatpants instead of shorts. Who knew it was going to be a scorcher at 9:30 am? He had on a short sleeve shirt and sandals, but apparently the sweatpants were enough to make him overheat and break out in a blotchy rash. Poor kid.

The next day we ventured into Manhattan with Aunt Tori to check out City Treehouse with some friends. When we got back, Blake was long overdue for a nap. So, being the smart momma that I am, I decided to strip Blakeyboo down to his birthday suit so he would be more comfortable. I figured his heat rash was bothering him, especially the areas that are covered by a diaper. Aunt Tori took off his crib sheet and we laid a towel down in case he accidentally peed during his nap. Except I didn't think about the possibility of an accidental poop.

After 20 minutes of strange noises and then a helpless cry, I decided to go check on Blake. As I entered his room I was smacked in the face with the smell of poop. I had an idea of what the scene would look like before I even turned on the lights. And I was right. "Poop is raining from the ceiling. Poop!"

I suspect it could have been a lot worse. It could have gotten all over the crib and on the wall. I should count myself lucky that it was somewhat contained. I'm also lucky that Aunt Tori was here to help me clean up the disgusting mess. I love my child and I'll do anything for him. But I'd be ok not having to do that again.

On a more disgusting note...I think he may have had a little taste, as evidenced by the poop 'stache. (shudder)

toddler vanity

2011-05-26T11:00:00.001-04:00

Blake has developed a cute little habit of checking himself out in the mirror.

Gotta look good for the ladies.

(Please excuse the disgustingly dirty mirror.)

peek-a-boo

2011-05-23T23:04:00.000-04:00

Adventures with a 1 year old- The Playground

2011-05-18T11:57:00.000-04:00

I remember going to playgroup before Blake was able to crawl and sitting on the bench watching the other moms play with their kids. I would think to myself, "I feel kind of stupid just sitting here with a baby. I can't wait until Blake can walk around the playground and have fun." I really need to stop the whole, "I can't wait until my baby can do (insert milestone here)" thing. Newsflash: YOU CAN WAIT!

Now that Blake has mastered walking, our playground trips are a lot different.

There's lots of running away from Mommy

and picking up sticks in order to poke them through holes.

Sometimes if we're feeling brave, a trip down the slide will happen a few times. But absolutely no swinging on the swings. Blake in a swing=unhappy baby.

Of course there's lots of picking things up and putting them in the mouth (Blake, not me).

And the occasional bear stops by to play.

It's also becoming a tradition for Blake to get waaaaaaaaaaaay to close to an edge or try to man some stairs on his own.

And it wouldn't be a day at the playground if we didn't chase some pigeons. I'm just waiting for one to poop on Blake. Or for Blake to poop on one of the pigeons. Just kidding.

Sunday

2011-05-17T11:43:00.000-04:00

Sunday morning. 6:30 am. Shower. Get ready for church. 7:00 am. Feed Blake. 7:30 am. We're supposed to be ready to leave for early church meetings, but we aren't.

Ok, so I'm going to be late. That's ok. I tried really hard to get to my meeting on time.

7:40 am. Open door to a torrential downpour. There's no way I can go out in this weather. There's no way I can stay dry. I guess I'm going to get wet because we have to leave now. Here we go.7:42 am. Rain lets up a bit. Right shoe soaked after stepping in a huge puddle.

7:44 am. Stupid wet hands. Stupid metro card stuck in my wallet. Stupid heavy stroller filled with too much stuff. 7:45 am. Stupid train I just barely missed which means I'm really going to be late for my meeting. Wait, no, with all due respect, this is not how it's supposed to work, Heavenly Father. I went out into the rain. I decided it was more important to go to church wet than to stay home and be dry. I made that sacrifice. Ok, so it wasn't a huge sacrifice, but still. You were supposed to make that train wait for me. You know the, "We are being held by the train's dispatcher" thing they always say when the train stops for no reason or stays in the station longer than usual. Ya, I was supposed to be on that train. That was my blessing for walking in the rain.

7:47 am. Cue tears. Awesome. I'm crying in the subway. Ok not crying, just trying not to let the tears roll down my face. Oh who cares. My make up and hair are already ruined anyway. I was supposed to be on that train. Why am I upset about missing that train? So what if I'm late? It's not that time of the month, so why am I being so emotional?

7:58 am. It's going to be another 10 minutes before a train comes. I tried. I tried my best to leave on time. 8:02 am. Train is coming. Ok good. But don't be disappointed if you miss the other train you need to catch because the way this day is going, that's exactly what's going to happen.

8:11 am. Ok, I'll run for the next train, but don't be mad if you miss it. Running up first set of steps. Hear the train coming to a stop and doors opening. Running down next set of steps. There it is. There's the train I need. I'm not going to make it. 8:12 am. I made it. "We are being held by the train's dispatcher." Of course.

8:17 am. There's actually a chance I could be on time for my meeting. 8:31 am. Here's our stop. Ok, only a few minutes late. 8:32 am. I walk past the Bishop's office door just as Evan is coming out. Right on time.

8:33 am. You can be happy on the days that go your way. But can you be happy on the days that don't?

source

Still workin' on that one.