this just in...

So I was checking my husband's email today (slow day at work) and saw that JetBlue gave us both $25 vouchers because of problems with the flight we were on coming back from CA. (the post below will go into great detail as to why this flight confirmed my detestation for flying) But hey, I'll fly JetBlue again knowing I have $25 towards a flight even if that means we have a little turbulence. The voucher is probably a result of a passenger complaining that the plane was an hour late and no one let us know what was going on. Looks like we'll be taking another trip soon! Where can we go for $50?

oh and did I mention I hate flying?

After my last trip back from VA, I decided flying in an airplane was at the bottom of my to-do list. This was probably because the crazy pilot decided it would be ok to drop from 25, 000 feet to 15, ooo feet in a matter of two seconds. For more on this story, scroll down. After much contemplation I decided that maybe I didn't like flying for more than two hours rather than not liking flying at all. I guess I imagined that the longer I am in the air the more time there is for something bad to happen. Like maybe four hours gives the engines just enough time to overheat and blow up sending little old Whitney plummeting to the ground as opposed to two hours where the engines stay nice and functioning.

Alas, I have confirmed that I do not like flying at all. I don't like waiting in the airport. I don't like rushing to line up when the plane is ready to board. I don't like sitting in a seat that is really designed for one butt cheek, not two. I don't like sitting by people I don't know. I don't like breathing airplane air. You would think that being so high up in the sky you would get some fresh air. No. You don't. I don't like the take off. It always feels like the butt of the plane is going to scrape the ground. I'm constantly thinking, "Get it up, get it up!" I certainly don't like having to yell my drink order at the flight attendant. Personally I try not to drink anything before and during a flight because there's no way I'm crawling over two people to use the tiniest bathroom known to man. But as of late I've felt nauseous while flying and need a little carbonation to settle the ol' tum tum. I don't like not being able to move at all. The whole seat reclining thing is a joke. You go from here, to here. (If you could see my hand it would be pointing straight up, then only slightly to the right but still basically up.) And don't get me started about the time my head was crushed when I tried to fall asleep on the tray table and the lady in front of me reclined her seat. I should have punched the back of her seat as hard as I could and said, "Oh by all means, take up the whole dang plane!" But probably the thing I hate most about flying is turbulence. If I were a pilot I would avoid turbulence at all cost. I would fly around turbulence. Actually if I were a pilot I would probably just keep the plane on the ground and drive to the destination. Do you know how big a plane is? Seriously. Who would stop us? I'm sure that pilots try to avoid turbulence as much as possible. But it seems like the last two flights I've been on have been turbulence bound. The last flight I was on got pretty bumpy towards the end. The flight was only an hour and a half long, but I felt like I was two minutes from death. The flight was ok because I got to watch TV (whoever decided to do the personal TV thing on JetBlue was a genius) so I wasn't really focusing on the big metal bird of death that I voluntarily boarded an hour ago. But of course the turbulence started. It wasn't just a few bumps. It was continuous bumping and dipping like you are driving on some back country dirt road that has potholes. At one point during the flight of death I could feel the wind pushing the plane. At this point I knew I was done. I just doubled over and put my head on Evan's lap. Of course he's cool as a freakin' cucumber. I bet if the plane was really spiralling out of control he'd still be saying, "It's ok. You're fine." while everyone else, including me, is screaming and trying to grab the oxygen masks from the ceiling. (by the way, are those oxygen masks real or are they just there to make you feel like you can still breathe?) Of course the lady next to me is looking at me like I'm crazy. I think she was a little nervous too. She actually took my seatbelt so when I sat down it was awkward having to act like I didn't notice that she had incorrectly buckled her seatbelt using my strap and try to dig under her for another flimsy strap of fabric that we all know isn't doing anything if that plane goes down. When I started to struggle to get the belt she said, "Oh, sorry. I don't know why it's like that." I wanted to say, "It's like that because you are sitting on your belt and grabbed mine by mistake. That's why it's like that. But we're all gonna die anyway. You might as well be strapped in for it." Anyway so we eventually land. I looked at Evan and told him I was never flying again. I don't care how far I have to drive, I'm not flying. But we all know that's not true.

Check out this website for turbulence info. I feel a little better about flying after reading some of the questions and answers. I still hate turbulence. http://www.geocities.com/khlim777_my/asturbulence.htm#More

smile update

So as I left work yesterday I decided I was going to smile all the way home. I wanted to see if my smile would inspire others to smile. I felt really stupid at first, but it helped to have my sunglasses on. I didn't have to make eye contact with anyone and if I did they wouldn't be able to see me. So as I walked to my car I passed only a few people. One guy drove by and looked at me as I stood at the crosswalk. He totally had the look of, "What's she smilin' at?" I know this look because I do it all the time when I see the no-reason smiles. Anyway, so I found it a bit difficult to continue to smile, but I kept on cheesin' it up the whole way home. While I was driving in the car and smiling simultaneously I saw a girl smile back at me. When I got home I honestly had the thought that I should smile for no reason on the way home more often. I felt like I had a happy little secret and other people wanted to know what it was. For as goofy as I think the no-reason smilers look, it actually made me feel happy to smile even though nothing had really happened for me to feel happier than I normally do. Anyway, so I encourage everyone (or the 3 people that read this blog) to try smiling for no reason one day for at least fifteen minutes. Let me know how it goes.

smiley mcsmileface

So it's really important for me to blog about something as soon as I think I have something blog-worthy. If I don't I will sit at the computer wondering if I should blog about it, if it's too stupid to blog about, if anyone will be able to relate, or if I should just delete the whole blog itself (which I predicted I would do within a week of creating the blog). Oh, side note: I think it's cute when couples and families have blogs so that their families can keep up with the happenings of their life. I tend to use the phone for that. (but apparently using your cell phone might cause cancer, so I guess blogging is the safer way to keep in touch. Gosh, what doesn't cause cancer these days?! One day the egg is good for you, the next day they're telling you if you so much as look at an egg your eyes will fall out and you'll be dead within seconds. I know, a little dramatic.)

Wow, long side note. So as I walked into work this morning, I saw a lady riding her bike and smiling. She wasn't smiling at any particular person...just smiling. I've seen these people before and I'm sure you know what I'm talking about: the people who just smile for no reason. I used to be slightly annoyed with these people. Whenever I would see their stupid no-reason smiles I would think, "What the heck are you smilin' at!? Am I missing something? Is there a giant ice cream cone in the sky that you happen to be looking at right now and I just can't see it?" I think I was mostly annoyed because it seemed so fake. And I will say that I have met some fake smiley people and maybe this is where the annoyance came from. Or maybe it's just that I'm not a naturally smiley person. I look really mad when I'm just walking places, or shopping for groceries, or driving. I usually have something on my mind like, "I think my thighs have always rubbed together. There has never been a time when they haven't touched." Ok, I'm not that shallow, but I have things on my mind. So as the smiley lady passed me on her bike I wondered what it would feel like to just smile for no reason. I'm going to try it on my way home today. I'm just gonna smile the whole way home and see if anyone looks at me like I'm deranged. Or maybe I should try to count the number of people who smile when they see me smile. I'll be wearing sunglasses so they won't be able to tell if I'm looking at them or not. That'll fake 'em out nicely because I'll be starin' 'em down and they won't even know it. All the while with a smile on my face.


Here's a link that gives the steps to developing your smile...seriously: http://www.wikihow.com/Smile

free downy ball

As silly as this sounds, I like to go through and read my old posts. I find them rather amusing. Expecially the one that talks about me letting myself go. Haha it's more true now than it was when I posted it. I'm sitting at work right now and it feels like I have a rubber tire around my waste. I believe in the weight loss world that is referred to as a "spare tire". I can definitely spare it. So that's just an update on my "letting myself go"ness. That's so not a word.

I usually only blog when something funny has happened to me. Nothing all that funny has happened to me as of late hence the lack of posts. If I did blog everyday this is what it would look like: "I'm at work again...just sitting...feeling the spare tire around my waste expand. Oh, a bird just smacked into the window. It'll probably die. Stupid birds." That's pretty much how most of my days go. Anyway, so that's why I can only write when something hilarious/embarrassing happens to me because otherwise my blog would be a boring blog and that is not acceptable.

So the other night Evan was doing laundry. He noticed that we had fabric softener, which I inherited from my sister when she was cleaning out her apartment, and decided to use it. I had noticed on prior occasions of doing laundry that there was a downy ball (used for dispensing fabric softener) that had fallen beside the wall and the washer. I had thought about trying to retrieve the ball, but was hindered by the spare tire that is currently growing around my waste (refer to beginning of blog for spare tire reference). Ok, the spare tire hindering me isn't entirely true. When I attempted to retrieve the ball I discovered that it was lodged between the wall and the washer. I was not expecting this and thus gave up quickly. So when I saw Evan using the fabric softener I told him about the downy ball. He got a random strip of metal and tried to dislodge the ball. He was unsuccessful. Evan suggested using a hanger, so I grabbed one and started trying to loop the hook of the hanger around the loop of the downy ball. This didn't work. I finally was able to bend down and grasp the hook of the hanger and another part of the hanger and pull the downy ball up. I was ecstatic, mostly because I think Evan had given up hope of scoring a free downy ball. I, on the other hand, remained valiant in my efforts. (I really was excited!)

This probably isn't the funniest post I've ever written. I work 8 hours a day and don't really have an exciting life. What do you expect?

How cute is this thing?! Yes, I found it while I was at work.

"please return your seats and tray tables to their upright and locked position"

I really don't like flying. I know it's supposed to be safer than driving, but there's something about boarding a large metal bird and flying thousands of miles above land that makes me a little nervous. Maybe it's because I watch LOST and the images of people being sucked out of the back of a plane that has broken in half and falling into the ocean are burned into my brain. Anyway so flying is not my favorite thing to do. My husband and I were flying back from Virginia and we were landing in Denver and then on to Salt Lake. Of course there was a storm and the captain told us that it might get bumpy. As the plane descended through the storm there was a lot of turbulence. At one point the plane dipped down really fast. I grabbed my husband and buried my head into his shirt. The other passengers reacted by saying, "Wooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!" It wasn't the good woah when you are having the time of your life on a roller coaster. It was the type of woah when you think, "We're gonna die, we're gonna die, we're gonna die." Well at least that's what I was thinking. Of course Evan laughs at me for being so scared and the guy next to him is looking at me like I'm crazy. Maybe he was looking at me like that because he felt the same way and wished it was socially acceptable for him to react the way I was reacting. So we finally land but then we took off again twenty minutes later. So flying is still not something I want to do for a while.

On a lighter note, my husband stole my pillow last night...and I was sleeping on it! Usually after I get up he'll take it and use it along with his pillow. But last night Evan rolled over and pulled my pillow out from under my head. Of course this woke me up and I had to take it back. Of course he doesn't remember this and I swear it wasn't a dream. I'm 98% sure that it wasn't a dream. It was pretty hilarious.