6 things

Since yesterday our sweet bundle of drool, I mean joy, turned 6 months old, I thought today I would write about 6 things I've learned since becoming a mom.

1. The way you pictured giving birth may, in reality, not happen as you'd hoped.
I was induced because I was a week past my due date. I really thought my body would do what it was supposed to and that I would have a baby the old fashion way: lots of pushing, sweating, grunting, possible screaming (although I always knew I would be getting an epidural. Birthing a baby was not the time for me to show my pioneer spirit.) and then out comes the baby. Well, that didn't happen. I had to have a C-section. I was actually really sad when the doctor said I'd need one. I just feel like it sets me up for more complications with other pregnancies. But, things don't always go as planned.

2. Breastfeeding hurts...A LOT!
Ok, now I know breastfeeding does not hurt for everyone. And if it was a breeze for you, then you are one of the blessed. But, for some women it is incredibly painful. I am one of those women. No, I wasn't doing anything wrong. It just hurt. And every consultant I talked to, every pamphlet I read, every prenatal class I attended told me it should not hurt. So I couldn't help but wonder through the tears as my baby tried to nurse what in the world was I doing wrong? Well it turns out that there's something called latch-on pain. The only way I found out about this was through a lot of research online. I finally found something that told me that as the baby starts to nurse there might be as long as 60 seconds of pain as everything gets into place. After that it shouldn't hurt. That was basically what I was experiencing: 30 seconds of pain, then it wouldn't really hurt after that. But when all you hear is, "It shouldn't hurt. If it hurts you're doing it wrong, " you think that if there's any pain at all then you should take the baby off and start again. Not true.

3. You will get lots of advice and will probably only use about 2% of what you're told.
Every baby is different. Some things work for one baby that might not work for another baby. So, you figure out what works and do it.

4. The first few months are...*ahem*...difficult.
I know motherhood will always be difficult and mothers deal differently with different stages their children go through. While I love Blake and have loved him since he was born, there were times, like when he was waking up every 2 hours to eat, that I thought, "What have I done? My life is over. I can't be a mom." This thought usually popped into my head around 3 am when he was waking up after I tried to quietly slip into bed without disturbing him. My mom kept telling me it would get easier. I didn't really believe her because when you are in the throes of the most exhausting experience of your life you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. (Mostly because your eyes are always half open due to lack of sleep.) But, it has gotten easier, and more enjoyable. I think I love every stage Blake has gone through. I miss how little he was when he was born but am glad he's on a more regular schedule. So, it does get better.

5. I don't sleep the same way I used to.
I don't think I have had a deep night's sleep since Blake was born. Even though he doesn't sleep right next to my bed like he used to, I can hear him turn over in his crib, drop his pacifier, whimper, and cry out when I'm sleeping. And it usually wakes me up, at which point I say over and over in my head, "Please stay asleep, please stay asleep!" I think with motherhood I've developed an increased ability to hear him. Super hearing. (Not the super power I would have chosen, per se, but oh well.)

6. 99% of mothers are trying to do their best.
I'm sure there's a percentage of mothers (I hope it's less than 1%) that aren't trying their best or who are addicted to some substance and have lost their ability to care for a child. But, for the most part, mothers are really trying to do what is best for their children. Whether they bottle or breastfeed, co-sleep or put their baby in a crib, wear their baby, teach their baby sign language, play classical music for their baby, put their baby in day care, or don't do any of those things, they really are trying their hardest to be a good mom. And as mothers we should support each other. We shouldn't make one another feel bad for not doing something that we are. I may not make the same choices as other mothers, but that's only because I feel like my choices are best for my baby. Your choices may be different. And I'm not going to judge you for that.

This isn't all I've learned as a mother, but I think these are things I wish I had known before I had a baby. It's been a crazy 6 months. And when he starts crawling it's only going to get crazier. I'm a little scared.

Happy 6 month birthday, Blakey boo!

I'm sure he'll love that little nickname when he's 16. 6 months ago today I was laying in a hospital bed convinced that in about 2 hours I'd have a beautiful baby boy. Nature had a different idea of how things would go down. You can read about it here. (It's long and slightly depressing. I was really emotional about the whole experience for a while.)

But, this blog post isn't about me. It's about our little baby who is growing up way too quickly. It seems like yesterday he was snorting when he cried and didn't know the meaning of the word sleep. (Well, we're still working on the sleep thing.)

 I've always wondered how some women can look amazing after they give birth. 

I was not one of them, nor will I ever try to be. I'm having a baby here, people!

Now, Blake has 2 teeth, not much more hair than when he was born, and a set of lungs that has only gotten stronger with time. He loves to play in his jungle bouncer and make all sorts of wonderful noises for the people below us to wonder what the heck is going on up here. He can't crawl yet, but can push himself backwards. He usually ends up pushed under the couch, staring at me like, "Ummmm, I'm stuck."

 He's gotten really good at eating solids. We started peas yesterday. He's not really a fan of those. But, who is!? I'm guessing he is close to 17 pounds, 27 inches long. We don't go to the doctor for his 6 month check up for another 2 weeks, so we won't know how much he's grown until then. Overall, he's a pretty happy baby. I'm excited to see what the next 6 months have in store! (and slightly nervous about the whole crawling and walking thing. At least now he stays in one general area!)

Happy birthday, Blake!

little drummer boy

He looks a little scared, then happy, then confused.

Seeing New York- Green-Wood Cemetery

Our next adventure in exploring New York was visiting the Green-Wood cemetery. We decided to walk to the cemetery which is about 1.5 miles away. We could have taken the subway, but it was a nice day and we can always use an extra $5. I didn't really know what to expect from a cemetery so I was pretty surprised when we walked up and saw the entrance:

It looked so cool! So we took a stroll around all 478 acres (ok not really. We probably didn't even see half the cemetery. Maybe if we had taken the subway we would have been in better shape to see more of the cemetery.) It was really pretty and actually really quiet. It was nice to be in a quiet, peaceful place for a change. Where we live is pretty busy and loud most of the time. So visiting the cemetery was a nice change.

He did try to eat the grass right after this picture was taken.

  Can you see the city skyline in the back? So cool!

 If anyone ever asks me why I love the east coast, I'll just show them this picture. (and they'll probably say, "Because of the dead people?")

Story: I saw this tree and thought it would be funny to lean against it and hold Blake up in the crook so it looked like he had climbed up himself. That didn't quite work out because the tree looked gross (I don't know how else to explain it other than it looked like something was going to crawl out of a nook or cranny.) So just pretend like it looks like a 6 month old climbed a tree by himself. Funny, right?

Blake looks so grown up to me in this picture. And he's making two little bald patches on my head.

Reflecting on life.

The Green-Wood cemetery was fun to visit. I think it might be more fun if next time we tour it in a car (just so we can see all of it.) Next site-seeing adventure: Governors Island! (hopefully)

Brooklyn, we have a problem*

So, I decided I wasn't going to blog about this topic because 1) I don't think my husband would want me to and 2) it's kind of embarrassing and I don't want it to keep people from coming over...not that we have people over often. But, because this blog is more or less a journal I've been keeping for a few years, I think I need to blog about it. And journaling is a way for me to get my frustrations out and sometimes a way for me to see that my situation isn't all that bad. So here it is:

A few months ago Blake and I finally got to move to New York to be with Evan. It was a long 3 months of separation so we were happy to finally be a family again. All was well for about 2 weeks. One night I was sitting on a mattress we had on the floor because our stuff still hadn't arrived. I was playing with Blake when I looked over and saw...a roach. *gasp* I didn't even really stop to process what it was. I just saw something crawling towards me on the mattress, screamed, grabbed Blake, and ran into our living room. Blake started crying because I obviously scared the daylights out of him and Evan thought something had happened to Blake. Through gasps of air I tried to communicate to Evan that there was a roach in the other room and that he needed to go be the man of the house and kill it. He was able to find it and killed it. And, he knows me so well that he even left it out so I could see that he killed it because once he told me he killed a spider and he in fact did not kill said spider. So Evan, being the caring husband that he is, tried to play it off like that was the only roach we'd ever have and that he had seen it before but couldn't kill it so he was glad that we had finally gotten rid of it. Only, the rule of the insect world is, "Where there's one, there's hundreds"...or millions...or trillions! {shudder}

So as much as I tried to tell myself that it was the only roach we'd ever have, I knew that wasn't true. A few nights later Evan was asleep and I went into the kitchen to make a bottle for Blake. As I turned to my left, there it was...the biggest roach I had ever seen. We have hardwood floors that have lots of dark spots in them so I had to bend down a little just to make sure it wasn't just a spot on the floor. Due to the earlier roach incident, I decided wearing shoes at all times in the house was now a necessity. I would not be caught barefoot when I saw another roach only to have it escape. So it took about 30 seconds for me to muster the courage to kill the thing, which makes me think it may have been dead or on its way out of this world because what kind of roach just sits there for 30 seconds? Anyway, I smushed it with my shoe and ran into the bedroom crying and telling Evan I couldn't live here with roaches. He cleaned up the remains and apologized for making us live here.

For a while I was scared to go into the kitchen. I would stand in the doorway, surveying the floor so as not to be ambushed by any roaches. Then I would only spend enough time in the kitchen to make a bottle or heat something up. I researched online the best way to get rid of roaches and found out that boric acid as well as keeping things really clean is the best way to get them out of your life. My kitchen and bathroom are lined with boric acid (100% boric acid, not the sissy gel stuff.) I don't leave food out uncovered, I make sure the dishes are clean and put away before I go to bed, I vacuum the floor a few times a week, and try to keep things really clean. And it was working...until this morning. Evan killed a roach in the bathtub.

I've killed a few tiny ones in the bathroom. I can handle the tiny ones. Unfortunately the tiny ones turn into big ones. And it's the big ones that make me lose sleep at night. My downstairs neighbor told me that roaches are just a part of living in New York. I'm not sure I believe that they have to be. I know that no matter where we live we'll have to deal with some sort of pest, well, pestering us. I just deal a lot better with ants, or something small. Anyway, so I'll be vacuuming every night and trying to figure out how to rid myself of these disgusting creatures. Suggestions are welcome.


*I don't want anyone to think that we have roaches crawling all over. I've only actually seen 2 and killed 1. We are very clean people and have actually become more clean since moving to New York. I just think all bugs are disgusting and think it would be too soon if I never saw one again.

wow.

This girl is amazing. Not only does her ability to turn an ugly dress into a stunner astound me, but her ability to see a certain design or come up with one on her own and execute it leaves me speechless.

http://newdressaday.wordpress.com/

On a more disgusting note, I woke up with a spider crawling on my pillow this morning. Goodness knows how long that spider had been using my bed and most likely body as it's own little spider playground. Luckily I saw it and disposed of it. And Blake enjoyed watching me do it. It wasn't a very big spider. But my rule is if it doesn't pay rent it can't live in our apartment. (Blake is excluded from that rule. He's so cute he can pretty much do whatever he wants...except pull my hair. That's against the rules.)

I keep trying to post a cute video of Blake, but it's taking forever so I gave up. You'll just have to imagine him doing something cute.

A Laundry Story

On a crisp, autumn night 2 piles of laundry sat on the floor of a brownstone in Brooklyn. They certainly weren't going to clean themselves, so they were gathered into a bag and taken to a nearby laundromat. They were rinsed, sudsed, rinsed again, spun, and tumbled until they were dry and ready for folding. The events that transpired when the clothes arrived back at the brownstone are in fact true:

"Blake, do you want to h..."

"Hang on, Mom. I'm watching Wipeout."

"Will you help me fold the laundry while you watch?"

"I'd love to!"

"Ok. Here's your pile."

"Oooo they're still warm!"

"Hey! Here's my sock! I'll just hang on to it while I look for the other one..."

"Hey! My moon!"

"Now where did I put that sock?"

"Here it is!"

"All done, Mom!"

"Thanks, Blakey! Are you ready to go to bed?"

 "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

The End