I hadn't really decided one way or the other whether I was going to exclusively breastfeed Blake when he was born. I did know that I wanted to try, and I resolved not to beat myself up about it if I decided not to breastfeed him.
It was an extremely painful 3 months that I breastfed Blake. From the get go I didn't produce enough milk to even begin to adequately nourish him. People kept telling me my milk would come in and then I'd be so engorged that I wouldn't be able to wait until the next feeding just to relieve the pressure. Guess the girls never got the memo.
And even though I think I fought a good fight when it came to breastfeeding, I still feel a twinge of guilt when someone asks me if I breastfeed Blake or when I hear other mothers discussing the ups and downs of breastfeeding. It's even worse when people react with shock when I say I stopped after 3 months.
It wasn't until Blake was about 6 months old that I heard about breast milk banks. Mothers donate their breast milk so we non-producers can make sure our babies get breast milk, even if it isn't from us. The idea of human milk banks is kind of weird to me. And at sometimes $40 for an 8 oz. bottle, it really isn't an option for me (because I'd like to eat, and more than that, I want my child to have clothes). Groups like Eats On Feets help connect women who need breast milk with women who want to donate theirs. Except Eats On Feets doesn't screen their donors. That's the responsibility of the recipient (and that can mean paying for blood tests, etc.)
I've always maintained the philosophy that most mothers are trying to do what's best for their babies. Is breast milk better for babies? Of course it is. But not every mother's cup runneth over when it comes to that aspect of motherhood.
So breastfeed (or don't), formula feed (or don't), or use someone else's breast milk (or don't). You decide. You're the mom!
(And I'll be honest, I have a hard time believing breastfed kids are smarter than us formula babies. At least not by any significant margin. Just look at Eats On Feets. It's foot, not feets...hehe!)
6 comments:
The idea of breastfeeding never excited me, and even though I told myself I'd try, I didn't really even believe me. Even so, I felt incredibly guilty when I didn't even make it home from the hospital before I'd switched Garrett to exclusive formula feeding. But you know, once I stopped beating myself up about it, everything and everyone was fine. Sure breast milk might be better, but I have a hard time believing that breast-fed babies are always healthier or smarter or more bonded to their mothers than formula-fed ones. After all, just look at my boys -- they don't get sick very often, they can put two and two together as well as anyone else their age, and they're always clinging onto any available (or unavailable) limb I have. :)
Ew. Milk banks. Gag me. I remember at church a lady offered to pay me for milk because Kyler was so chubby and she always wanted a big baby. I was some what creeped out by the whole thing...and felt like she was checking out my jugs so I started pumping a bottle to give him at church from that moment on! I think anyone can understand your situation with the feeding thing - hello, you had to go back to work, raise a baby yourself, and move across the ENTIRE county with very little help! Even if you were able to produce more milk, between all those things it would have been nearly impossible to breastfeed exclusively. I don't think nursing makes a kid any smarter, I just think that has to do with the amount of time spent with your kid (which you can spend just as much time bottle feeding, just some bottle fed babies go to sitters, etc.) If I couldn't have nursed, I would have done formula, but there is not a chance in the world I would do someone else's milk. That's just straight up creepy.
I know Shell Walker. She was the midwife I was going to go with but my husband and I were not able to afford the costs up front. I had a huge problem breast feeding. I couldn't produce it and I supplemented and breast fed for three months. I think it's great that she's started Eats on Feets, but really I don't think I could give my child milk from another person. It's not just milk, it's the bond. And we couldn't afford doner milk either, and had two friends who said they would pump and supply me with milk, but I just couldn't do it.
Best line: "Guess the girls didn't get the memo." I miss breastfeeding. But I'll tell you that anyone (like I used to) who thinks that formula-feeding is easier than BFing is dead wrong!
"guess the girls never got the memo" hahaa! and yeah....feets.....
I wish sometimes I didn't breastfeed because Asha is almost two and still at it. But it's the cheaper option...hahah. I would rather do formula than ever go to a milk bank. I agree with Chelsea it is creepy
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