Friday, January 27, 2012

the saddest words ever uttered

Ok, so that's kind of dramatic.

In the almost 2 years (feels more like 5) that we've lived here, the majority of my time has been spent dreaming about when we get to leave. As much as I've tried to embrace where we live, it's proven difficult. On good days I can handle unfamiliar city life without many complaints. On bad days I entertain the idea of just packing a bag for Blake and me and catching the next flight out of here (of course Evan would join us as soon as he got home from work). At one point I had decided that we needed to move away as soon as possible. I encouraged Evan to look for a job elsewhere and I even started looking for jobs for him.

But with Jerky McJerkFace living downstairs, we decided moving now (instead of waiting to move until we officially leave NYC) was the best option for us. We were able to find an apartment that better suits our needs even if it is a bit smaller than our current place.

As we walked to the subway after signing our new lease, Evan said, "Let's face it. We aren't going anywhere any time soon." His statement almost took my breath away. And then I realized he's probably right. And it's probably time for me to stop thinking otherwise.

It's exhausting to spend your days dreaming of being anywhere than where you actually are. So I have to face it. We're going to be here for a while longer. Not forever. Just a while a longer.


vdg family said...

Here's the truth, I'm sooooo glad you're moving closer to us! :) It will be great!

Lindsay said...

Those are sad words, and every time Blake says them to me, I want to cry. But then I think about the things that I'll seriously miss someday when we do leave and that makes me want to cry enough to cancel out the tears altogether (most days, anyway).

Stephanie said...

aww my sorry...i know EXACTLY how you feel. But maybe this will give you the opportunity to shake off those feelings and truly embrace where you are. There will be good days and bad...but i think you'll find there will be more good days...and you know if you ever need anyone to vent here!! <3

Stephanie said...

oh yeah, congratulations on your new place!!! I hope you will love it!

Allison Krumpe said...

Whitney why did i almost cry reading this? I want to live in a 2 bedroom overpriced apt in NYC! Get me out of RICHMOND! Wanna house swap? Love you! Allison Krumpe