There's a stream that runs through the park and I would often sit and listen to the sound of the water running. Even though the problems of life never went away after going up into the mountains, they seemed a little easier to deal with.
I don't live in Utah anymore, but sometimes I miss it. I miss the serenity of the mountains. The day before I left Utah to move to Brooklyn, I strapped a sleeping Blake into his car seat and drove around the town where we had been living for about 9 months. For the first time in my life I actually felt like I was going to miss Utah. Everything was so wide open and beautiful. I guess I never took the time to fully appreciate the beauty that surrounded me until I was leaving.
Now I live here.
And to be honest, I have a hard time finding the beauty in it. Maybe it's the trash that piles up on the sidewalk or the smell of cigarette smoke whenever I go...anywhere, even when we are sitting in the comfort of our own apartment. But worst of all, I have no where to go. I don't feel like I have a place where I can go to get away from it all. Sure, there's the Green-Wood cemetery which has probably been the most serene place I've been in Brooklyn. But the effort it takes to get myself there just doesn't seem worth it. It's no South Fork Park.
Quit complaining, right? I have a roof over my head and clothes on my back. I think it boils down to this: I'm not a city girl, and I'm probably never going to be one.