“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain
Last Sunday I wore panty hose. It pretty much ruined my day. But that's not what this post is about.
Recently Blake and I took a trip to Virginia to visit my family. I'd like to say that we did all sorts of things like visit civil war sites and colonial Williamsburg. We didn't do either of those things. I'm sure one day we will, probably when Blake is old enough to appreciate them. He's happy just playing with an empty cardboard box, so I'm not wasting a trip to Williamsburg just for him NOT to remember it.
What we did do is stay at my parents' nice, new, BIG house! I have to say, I absolutely love their new house, which is why I can't believe I didn't take any pictures of the house while I was visiting. We also decorated for Halloween (which I don't have any pictures of either so I'll just put a picture of my sister and Blake.)
And I went for a nice woodland stroll...in their backyard!
Basically my parents have a sacred grove-esque backyard. And I love it. It reminds me of one of my favorite paintings:
I feel like giving up and I haven't even really started. I liked being able to tell people that Blake was sleeping through the night most nights when he was about four and a half months old. He still woke up sometimes, but I could usually get him to go back to sleep. I don't know where that baby went. Blake slept through the night 2 nights last week. Every other night he was SCREAMING at 2 am and wouldn't go back to sleep until he had a bottle. I tried to let him cry a little, but this was not just his usual "I woke up and am going to fuss" type of crying. He was literally screaming like someone was trying to kill him. Do babies have bad dreams? Every night? Maybe he dreamed that every time he tried to drink from his bottle someone took it away from him. I guess that would make me scream too (except replace bottle with brownies). This morning I noticed he has some nasal congestion. He was really congested and slightly feverish when his bottom teeth came in so I'm hoping he's getting more teeth. I need an explanation as to why he's not sleeping. I can deal with the situation better if I have an explanation.
Due to the recent middle of the night awakenings going on at our house, I've been researching different methods for helping babies sleep through the night. That's where the giving up before I've started part comes in. I think it's made me feel a little anxious, like I should have been sleep training him 3 months ago and every night that he wakes up is just creating a pattern that will be harder to break. I really don't want to sleep train Blake. I just wanted him to naturally grow into a pattern of sleeping until at least 6 am. Not sure that's going to happen. I also am conflicted as to which method will work best for us. I'm not sure how one "expert" can claim never letting your baby cry and still being able to get them to sleep through the night is a successful method and another "expert" can say that letting them cry for increasingly longer periods of time will be the right way to teach them how to sleep. (And in all honesty, I can let him cry and fuss for a little while as he learns how to go back to sleep on his own. But recently it's not just crying, like I said, it's screaming.) So I'm just praying 2 little teeth pop out of his upper gums so he can get back to his little ol' sleeping self.
Any advice (what worked for you, what didn't work for you) would be helpful.
*I was going to write this post one morning at 2 am when I was up with Blake. It's probably better that I didn't. It would have probably contained my getaway plans and all forsaking of motherhood. It's been a rough week. Let's hope this week is better.
I could hear your phone conversation. I know you weren't talking to me, but you were sitting two inches away from me, so I could hear what you were saying. And I thought it was rude. Maybe I just don't have a thick skin, or maybe I just have manners and you don't. I knew you didn't want to sit by me when you gave me that nasty look as I politely smiled and shoved my diaper bag under the seat in front of me. Many people worry when they see a baby boarding a plane. "Oh no, will it sit by me? It's probably going to scream the whole time. Or, it's going to poop and I'm going to die from the smell," is probably what was going through your mind when you saw me checking which seat was mine. I understand. I prayed that my baby would sleep the whole flight, but I can't promise he will or that he won't make a peep. Was it really necessary for you to get on your phone before we took off and say, "Ya I'm in my seat. I'm sitting next to a baby." (long pause) "We'll see."? I gathered from your annoyed tone that the person you were on the phone with said something like this: "Ugh. Just your luck. Hope it doesn't cry the whole time. Or barf on you." Well, I think that was very rude of you to say with me sitting right next to you. I decided to just ignore you for two reasons 1) I'm sitting closer to you than I sit next to my own husband when we sit on our couch so I'm not really in the mood to argue about your rudeness and then have to sit next to you for an hour. 2) I don't need to apologize for having a baby and needing to use air transportation to get back home. You were a baby once. And frankly you were acting like a baby. If you wanted the perfect flight you should have bought all the seats around you to ensure that you didn't have to sit by someone who might disturb your magazine reading.
I could have been rude, too. I could have gotten on the phone and told someone that the person sitting next to me was taking up their whole seat and about 1/4 of mine. I could have asked one of the flight attendants if there were any open rows so I didn't have to sit next to you. But I didn't for 1 reason: you were the one that had a problem, not me. You can move yourself to a new seat.
your seat buddy (and the baby who slept the whole flight. You're welcome.)
Blake made it painfully obvious yesterday that I actually look very different when I have make up on and do my hair. Because my hair ends up in a ponytail by noon, I usually just blow dry it and put it up. The weather has been nice lately and it hasn't been very humid, so I decided to straighten my hair and wear it down for the day. That is until I walked in and Blake looked at me as if I was a total stranger. I can usually get a smile out of him when I walk into a room, but not yesterday. He just stared at me with a look that said, "Umm who are you? You sound like my mom, but you certainly don't look like my mom. She usually has dark circles under her eyes and her hair is in a ponytail." And I kid you not, it wasn't until after we got back from his doctor appointment when I put my hair in a ponytail that he actually gave me a smile of recognition. I guess it's good to know that he still loves me even when I'm not lookin' so hot (or that he may even prefer it to my more put together look.)
Blake had his 6 month check up and now weighs about 17 pounds and is 27'' long! As far as his cuteness goes, he's in the 100th percentile. He also had to get some immunizations and didn't cry at all! Such a brave little boy!
I was in Duane Reade the other day waiting for my prescription to be filled and decided to walk around and look at stuff. Nothing in particular, just stuff. Then I noticed something I had never seen before: single-use underwear for ladies. What? I picked up the package and looked for an explanation as to why anyone would need disposable underwear. No explanation. Are women spilling stuff on their regular underwear and think wearing disposable underwear would just be easier to deal with? Or maybe underwear is just disappearing and some women find it easier to buy underwear they are going to throw away after one use anyway. I don't get why anyone would ever need these. Ever.
Update: So I found the company that makes the disposable panties I saw. Their website describes the panties for this use: Because you never know when that time of the month will take you by surprise. Because on the last trip, the airline lost your luggage. Because they're small, and fit anywhere. Because you never know when you're going to work up a sweat.
While I don't think any of the above reasons would convince me to buy them, I guess other people may see them as necessary.
I know those aren't words, I just like the way they sound together. Based on yesterday's post, let's see how my day fared:
make- Blake slept for about an hour and a half for one of his afternoon naps.
break- I found out my winter clothes don't fit me. I guess I'm not really surprised. Although I thought for sure one shirt was definitely going to fit. Yes, I wore them anyway. Well I certainly wasn't going to be going to my dentist appointment naked!
make- I took the first step in finding a solution to my tooth problem.
break- I found out at the dentist office that I don't have dental coverage. 1 giant leap backward. I found out that we do have dental coverage but I took the wrong insurance card and now have to reschedule my appointment. Poop.
make- While shopping at the local supermarket, I found Edy's ice cream on sale for $2! (That should count for 2 makes. And even though eating ice cream makes my tooth hurt like no other, I eat it anyway...which is why my winter clothes don't fit.)
break- I couldn't get everything I needed at the supermarket because I had to push a stroller.
make- Yesterday morning it seemed like Blake was playing with me. Usually I just try to entertain him, but he rolled over and gave me what I'm calling a hug (even if he didn't know what he was doing.) It was cute.
break- I saw a used...ahem...contraceptive device on the sidewalk just as my stroller rolled over it. Sick.
It looks as if things pretty much evened out, making my day a pretty normal day. Lots of makes, lots of breaks. (Well, slightly more makes due to cheap ice cream.)
Yep! You guessed it! We got Blake his own computer and let him watch uplifting things online. No, that's not true. Actually we were able to watch General Conference. It was a nice relaxing weekend with a few walks around the block and naps between (and maybe sometimes for a few minutes during) sessions.
We also did this:
I started giving Blake juice in a sippy cup. I always get excited when we move on to something new (like bigger diapers, bigger clothes, different foods). But I always end up being more excited than Blake is about it. He took a few sips from his sippy cup and then abandoned it. And I had spent so much time standing in Target looking at the 1,000 different types of sippy cups they had! (Ok, that's not true because if you go to the same Target I go to, you know it is rarely well-stocked and I dread going there.) But I still took a few minutes to decide which sippy cup was best. With every new stage we come to I'm learning that we get to leave behind some old challenges and take on a bunch of new challenges. I should probably stop getting excited about all these new things because one day we'll move on to the stage where he's telling me he doesn't need me to wipe his nose or hold his hand. So carpe the diem, right? (You know, seize the carp.)
And just for your viewing and listening pleasure (and mostly for my mom to see):
"Wow! 3 videos!" is probably what you are thinking. You can thank me later. (I accept gift cards, cold hard cash, and baked goods.)
was the longest night of my life. Blake has had stuffy nose for a few days, so I've been debating whether to take him to the doctor. He hasn't had much of a fever and seems to be as happy as ever, just with a lot more stuff coming out of his nose than normal. So I don't know whether to attribute his stuffy nose to the weather, allergies to a new food, or something more serious. Because he still seems to be happy and doesn't have a fever anymore, I'm guessing he's ok. Doctor visit avoided (until next week when he has his 6 month check up).
Enter last night. I had been dealing with a sore throat and stuffy nose all day and attributed it to the night I stayed up with Blake until 4 am due to his stuffy nose. It seems when I don't get enough sleep whatever is lurking in the shadows of my cells decides to come out and take advantage of my weak immune system. I imagine it looks something like this:
So while I tried to sleep last night, little green guy was wreaking havoc on everything above my shoulders. I went to bed feeling ok, but woke up shortly after I had fallen asleep to a fever/chills, an even worse sore throat, no possible way of breathing through my nose, and worst of all, my jaw was aching. I don't even know what it means if you have a cold and your jaw hurts but I can't imagine it's a good thing. So I laid awake in bed for most of the night just praying for the light to break through the window so this night would be over. I remember laying there with my mouth open (to breathe of course) and my eyes half shut. I knew I looked like a hot mess because I felt like a hot mess. I checked my phone and it was only 3 am. I stayed in bed listening to the wind blow and wondering if the storm had already come and gone. Then I thought, "Who cares about the storm. I'm dyin' here!" Finally around 4:30 I got up and took some medicine and laid on the couch for an hour. I think I probably got a total of 2 hours of sleep last night.Boo.
Luckily when I got up for the second time this morning to make Blake a bottle, I was feeling better. My jaw had stopped aching, my throat wasn't as sore, and I thought there was a chance I could actually sleep. So Blake and I took an early morning nap for a few hours and here we are. I still feel terrible, but it's mostly a stuffy nose now, which I feel like I can handle. I really don't want to go to the doctor, mainly because I don't have a doctor here so I'll have to find one and walk in the rain with my baby to the doctor's office. Boo on that too.