Saturday, March 27, 2010
Monday, March 22, 2010
eternally minded
These were among the many words from excited family members I found comforting on the eve of our baby's arrival.
"Whitney is being induced tomorrow and it's made me think: somewhere today a son and Father and Mother are starting their final day together. They're in the kitchen, each enjoying their favorite bowl of cereal, talking about life together; experiences come up that make them laugh -- really laugh. At lunchtime our ancestors come over to the house. They serve taco salad because Mary's there. More funny, funny stories are shared by members of the Jordan family. Talk about laughter! After lunch they move into the family room. There, the tone turns serious as Blake gets a history lesson about the name he will be given in mortality. The history unfolds from the beginning to the present. It's powerful. There's been heartache, fear, loneliness and everything in between. But there's also been joy, covenants, faithfulness, determination, commitment and courage. Time passes quickly and it's time to go. They file past him one by one, "You're special, Blake." "We love you, Blake." "We're proud of you, Blake." "Don't blow it, Blake" "Kick that damn dog for me, Blake" (that's grandpa Jones).
Left alone is Father, Mother and son. They sit down on the couch in the living room and listen to Theodor Seuss Gisel read, "Oh, The Places You'll Go". They giggle again, knowing that some of it's true. They knows it's 5:30pm on earth in Utah and Blake needs to pack his bags. Our Father in heaven sleeps on the bottom bunk tonight, and He and Blake talk into the night. Tomorrow's a big day. We better get some sleep. There is peace and joy.
As Blake is born tomorrow, still ringing in his ears will be the final words God, the Father told him. Evan and Whitney, too, will hear the message as Blake enters mortality. It will be unspoken, but loud and clear and unmistaken. It is the instant that heaven and earth become one.
He will bring with him peace and joy (and some popsicles from Great Grandpa Jordan)."
Evan's father put these thoughts together and it's made me think of the time we all spent with Heavenly Father and Mother before we made our earthly appearance. It's comforting to think that our little one was so loved before he came to us and that there are so many people here who already love him without even knowing him. It's also comforting to know that even though our baby won't come with a handbook, we can ask his heavenly parents, who know him so well, for help when we don't have a clue what to do.
"Whitney is being induced tomorrow and it's made me think: somewhere today a son and Father and Mother are starting their final day together. They're in the kitchen, each enjoying their favorite bowl of cereal, talking about life together; experiences come up that make them laugh -- really laugh. At lunchtime our ancestors come over to the house. They serve taco salad because Mary's there. More funny, funny stories are shared by members of the Jordan family. Talk about laughter! After lunch they move into the family room. There, the tone turns serious as Blake gets a history lesson about the name he will be given in mortality. The history unfolds from the beginning to the present. It's powerful. There's been heartache, fear, loneliness and everything in between. But there's also been joy, covenants, faithfulness, determination, commitment and courage. Time passes quickly and it's time to go. They file past him one by one, "You're special, Blake." "We love you, Blake." "We're proud of you, Blake." "Don't blow it, Blake" "Kick that damn dog for me, Blake" (that's grandpa Jones).
Left alone is Father, Mother and son. They sit down on the couch in the living room and listen to Theodor Seuss Gisel read, "Oh, The Places You'll Go". They giggle again, knowing that some of it's true. They knows it's 5:30pm on earth in Utah and Blake needs to pack his bags. Our Father in heaven sleeps on the bottom bunk tonight, and He and Blake talk into the night. Tomorrow's a big day. We better get some sleep. There is peace and joy.
As Blake is born tomorrow, still ringing in his ears will be the final words God, the Father told him. Evan and Whitney, too, will hear the message as Blake enters mortality. It will be unspoken, but loud and clear and unmistaken. It is the instant that heaven and earth become one.
He will bring with him peace and joy (and some popsicles from Great Grandpa Jordan)."
Evan's father put these thoughts together and it's made me think of the time we all spent with Heavenly Father and Mother before we made our earthly appearance. It's comforting to think that our little one was so loved before he came to us and that there are so many people here who already love him without even knowing him. It's also comforting to know that even though our baby won't come with a handbook, we can ask his heavenly parents, who know him so well, for help when we don't have a clue what to do.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
blessings
39 weeks...and still working. I'll be honest, I haven't complained much through out this entire pregnancy. I really haven't had any reason to complain. First trimester nausea wasn't terrible. It wasn't fun, but it wasn't a nightmare. (Well throwing up cold milk that hadn't been in my body long enough to warm up was interesting.) Second trimester brought a surge of energy. But now as I approach D-day, I'm really starting to feel it. My back hurts, my legs hurt, my face has decided it's back in high school and I have a lovely array of pimples. And the tears flow nightly as I struggle to get my substitute plans in order. I can't even wrap my brain around the fact that Evan will be leaving at the end of this month AND that I will have to go back to work in May. Wow just typing it out makes me want to scream about how unfair life is. But I can't do that. Because life hasn't been unfair to me. In fact, it seems I've been blessed more in the last 9 months than in my entire life. Here are a few examples:
1) I actually got a teaching job at a time when there are not any teaching jobs to spare.
2) I teach at a really great school.
3)I think my job has kept me from gaining unnecessary weight during my pregnancy. I stand for about 6 hours a day.
4)I don't think I could have a desk job. It is so uncomfortable to sit for long periods of time. I have to lay down or stand to be comfortable.
5) Evan recently got a job in New York...yea East Coast! (yikes, I'm going to live in NY!)
6)I have so many friends and family members who are so excited for the arrival of our baby. I can't imagine if people weren't excited!
7)Despite not having insurance prior to my job, Evan and I have been relatively healthy.
8) I get to be a mom. I've always wanted to be a mother, and now I get to have that opportunity.
I know there are many more blessings I've received. Those are just the ones that circle through my mind each day.
So I can push through these last few days (hopefully it's days) and do what I have to do for my family. I probably won't do it all with a smile (remember the nightly tears?), but I'll do it. Because I've been blessed.
1) I actually got a teaching job at a time when there are not any teaching jobs to spare.
2) I teach at a really great school.
3)I think my job has kept me from gaining unnecessary weight during my pregnancy. I stand for about 6 hours a day.
4)I don't think I could have a desk job. It is so uncomfortable to sit for long periods of time. I have to lay down or stand to be comfortable.
5) Evan recently got a job in New York...yea East Coast! (yikes, I'm going to live in NY!)
6)I have so many friends and family members who are so excited for the arrival of our baby. I can't imagine if people weren't excited!
7)Despite not having insurance prior to my job, Evan and I have been relatively healthy.
8) I get to be a mom. I've always wanted to be a mother, and now I get to have that opportunity.
I know there are many more blessings I've received. Those are just the ones that circle through my mind each day.
So I can push through these last few days (hopefully it's days) and do what I have to do for my family. I probably won't do it all with a smile (remember the nightly tears?), but I'll do it. Because I've been blessed.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
still growing
38 weeks and counting! Evan and I are so excited for the little one to come! At my last doctor's appointment the doctor told me I was only measuring at 35 weeks so I'm going in for an ultrasound to make sure everything is ok.
I had a baby shower this weekend and it was amazing! It was fun to hang out with my friends and family. My mom even got to skype with us during the shower. That was awesome! Yea for friends and family, and yea for baby! (No, he doesn't have a name. We are still working on that one.)
Sunday, February 14, 2010
36 weeks...oh my
Only 4 more weeks until our still unnamed child is set to enter the world. Whether he comes in 4 weeks is entirely up to him. One of my students said to me the other day, "Mrs. Jordan, I can't wait to meet your son!" My response: "I can't wait to meet him, too!"
Saturday, February 6, 2010
apologies
I've noticed as I've gotten older I have become more aware of the childish things I've done in my past. There are lots of things I wish I could go back and change, but most of those things don't really bother me. I have forgotten about them and moved on. But, there are 2 experiences that I will always remember and that I will always wish I could change.
When I was in 6th grade, all of the 6th graders were in trailers outside of the school. We were changing classes one day and I saw a large group of students standing in a circle. The group just happened to be right in front of the trailer I needed to go into. Somehow I ended up with a front row view of what was happening. A few boys were throwing rocks and kicking a girl who was huddled in a ball on the ground. This girl had been picked on since elementary school and to this day I cannot figure out why. I don't know how that stuff starts. So as I stood in the circle watching this girl be harassed I remember thinking, "You have to do something. You have to help her." But, I was terrified. I was so afraid if I stood up for this girl that I would start to be made fun of. So I just stood there, frozen with fear and disgusted with myself and the other students. Soon a teacher came outside and called us all animals and told us to get to class. I have always felt bad for not doing something to help that girl. It's amazing how a stupid decision in 6th grade can stay with you forever.
The second experience I wish I could change happened in 8th grade. I was taking Latin and our teacher was...lacking in the classroom management department. We only had about 8 students in our class, but no matter what he did he could not get the class under control. A lot of the students in my class were incredibly rude to our teacher. I don't ever remember being rude to our teacher, but I do remember doing things to annoy him. (Which was so not typical of me.) Now that I am a teacher and truly understand how difficult it is, I wish I could go back and change the way I behaved. If I had students that behave the way I behaved with this teacher I would hate my life. I would quit. I would give up. It wouldn't be worth it to me.
As I've reflected on these experiences I've realized that in some small way karma came back to bite me in the butt. There have been times when I've felt left out and not accepted just like the girl I watched being beat up in 6th grade. There have been times when a student has been rude to me and that's all I can think about for the rest of the week. So if that 6th grade girl or Latin teacher ever read my blog, I'm sorry for being a jerk. I promise I'm not a jerk.
On a lighter note, 5 more weeks until the little one gets here! Yikes!!!!
When I was in 6th grade, all of the 6th graders were in trailers outside of the school. We were changing classes one day and I saw a large group of students standing in a circle. The group just happened to be right in front of the trailer I needed to go into. Somehow I ended up with a front row view of what was happening. A few boys were throwing rocks and kicking a girl who was huddled in a ball on the ground. This girl had been picked on since elementary school and to this day I cannot figure out why. I don't know how that stuff starts. So as I stood in the circle watching this girl be harassed I remember thinking, "You have to do something. You have to help her." But, I was terrified. I was so afraid if I stood up for this girl that I would start to be made fun of. So I just stood there, frozen with fear and disgusted with myself and the other students. Soon a teacher came outside and called us all animals and told us to get to class. I have always felt bad for not doing something to help that girl. It's amazing how a stupid decision in 6th grade can stay with you forever.
The second experience I wish I could change happened in 8th grade. I was taking Latin and our teacher was...lacking in the classroom management department. We only had about 8 students in our class, but no matter what he did he could not get the class under control. A lot of the students in my class were incredibly rude to our teacher. I don't ever remember being rude to our teacher, but I do remember doing things to annoy him. (Which was so not typical of me.) Now that I am a teacher and truly understand how difficult it is, I wish I could go back and change the way I behaved. If I had students that behave the way I behaved with this teacher I would hate my life. I would quit. I would give up. It wouldn't be worth it to me.
As I've reflected on these experiences I've realized that in some small way karma came back to bite me in the butt. There have been times when I've felt left out and not accepted just like the girl I watched being beat up in 6th grade. There have been times when a student has been rude to me and that's all I can think about for the rest of the week. So if that 6th grade girl or Latin teacher ever read my blog, I'm sorry for being a jerk. I promise I'm not a jerk.
On a lighter note, 5 more weeks until the little one gets here! Yikes!!!!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Yuletide, 2 years, and panty hose
This year was a Christmas of firsts:
1. First Christmas not spent in Virginia
2. First Christmas as a paid working professional
3. First Christmas pregnant
Ok, so that's not a lot of firsts, but they are pretty big, life-changing firsts.
Evan and I spent Christmas in California this year. It was actually nice to not have a white Christmas this year. I like the snow, but I know I'll get my fill by mid-January so no snow on Christmas was fine by me. I got some much needed pregnancy clothes and much needed baby clothes. When I look at how small the onesies I have are I can’t imagine something being that small. But as Evan reminded me, I don’t want the baby to be much bigger when he’s born! We had a great Christmas this year. I just can’t believe next year we’ll have a baby to buy gifts for!
Evan and I also celebrated our 2 year anniversary! Our 10 hour car ride from California to Utah wasn’t the most exciting celebration, but we had fun reminiscing about the past year and our favorite memories. My favorite memories always involve Evan trying to make me laugh. His favorite memory was when I told him we were going to be parents. I think his memory trumps mine! But I do know I’ll need a good laugh at least weekly for the next few months. It’s gonna get crazy here!
Now, on to panty hose. I will never understand the science behind panty hose. First of all, I can’t stand things that are tight and uncomfortable. And I think if you look panty hose up in the dictionary you’ll see those two words: tight and uncomfortable. I’ve never been a panty hose wearer, but when it gets really cold in Utah I have to pull them out. When purchasing panty hose I never go by the sizing chart they provide. I just always buy extra extra large because I figure they won’t be tight and uncomfortable. But each time I open the package and start to put them on, I am disappointed. I squeeze into them and think, “These are supposed to fit someone between 5’2’’ and 5’9’’ from 200 to 320 pounds and they don’t even fit me!” So now that I’m pregnant I have really come to hate panty hose. I bought even bigger sizes to accommodate the human growing inside me, but I still have the same result. I did buy a pair of maternity tights yesterday, hoping they will be somewhat comfortable. And if by some miracle they are comfortable, I will probably wear them even when I’m not pregnant. But let’s just say I won’t be surprised if they are just as uncomfortable as all the others. So one day when I don’t have much to do (which won’t be for another 18 years I guess) I’m going to create a pair of panty hose for the everyday woman: a pair of panty hose that are just tight enough to stay up without cutting off the circulation to the lower half of the body. And I will be rich.
1. First Christmas not spent in Virginia
2. First Christmas as a paid working professional
3. First Christmas pregnant
Ok, so that's not a lot of firsts, but they are pretty big, life-changing firsts.
Evan and I spent Christmas in California this year. It was actually nice to not have a white Christmas this year. I like the snow, but I know I'll get my fill by mid-January so no snow on Christmas was fine by me. I got some much needed pregnancy clothes and much needed baby clothes. When I look at how small the onesies I have are I can’t imagine something being that small. But as Evan reminded me, I don’t want the baby to be much bigger when he’s born! We had a great Christmas this year. I just can’t believe next year we’ll have a baby to buy gifts for!
Evan and I also celebrated our 2 year anniversary! Our 10 hour car ride from California to Utah wasn’t the most exciting celebration, but we had fun reminiscing about the past year and our favorite memories. My favorite memories always involve Evan trying to make me laugh. His favorite memory was when I told him we were going to be parents. I think his memory trumps mine! But I do know I’ll need a good laugh at least weekly for the next few months. It’s gonna get crazy here!
Now, on to panty hose. I will never understand the science behind panty hose. First of all, I can’t stand things that are tight and uncomfortable. And I think if you look panty hose up in the dictionary you’ll see those two words: tight and uncomfortable. I’ve never been a panty hose wearer, but when it gets really cold in Utah I have to pull them out. When purchasing panty hose I never go by the sizing chart they provide. I just always buy extra extra large because I figure they won’t be tight and uncomfortable. But each time I open the package and start to put them on, I am disappointed. I squeeze into them and think, “These are supposed to fit someone between 5’2’’ and 5’9’’ from 200 to 320 pounds and they don’t even fit me!” So now that I’m pregnant I have really come to hate panty hose. I bought even bigger sizes to accommodate the human growing inside me, but I still have the same result. I did buy a pair of maternity tights yesterday, hoping they will be somewhat comfortable. And if by some miracle they are comfortable, I will probably wear them even when I’m not pregnant. But let’s just say I won’t be surprised if they are just as uncomfortable as all the others. So one day when I don’t have much to do (which won’t be for another 18 years I guess) I’m going to create a pair of panty hose for the everyday woman: a pair of panty hose that are just tight enough to stay up without cutting off the circulation to the lower half of the body. And I will be rich.
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