Wednesday, November 9, 2011

bad mom

Movies. TV. Impatience.

I've been a bad mom lately. As Blake gets older I'm finding it more difficult to keep him entertained. Guess what he's doing right now? Sitting quietly on the floor watching Toy Story 3. Guess what he was doing 5 minutes before that? Destroying our DVD player.

I hate using the television to distract him, but sometimes that's the only way I know how to keep him busy while I clean or make dinner. And as a 19 month old, his attention span with most other activities is only a few minutes. But when he watches TV or a movie I know I can get a pretty good chunk of time to do something. I see activities to do with toddlers and think, "Maybe I'll try that!" But as I read the details I think, "Well, Blake will just end up eating that." or "I'm going to take a few hours preparing an activity for him to be done with it in 5 minutes. And then what do I do?"

With the weather getting colder, I know our trips to the playground are numbered. Pretty soon it's going to be too cold to walk 10 blocks to the nicer playground and play for an hour. And after checking our expenses over the last few months, any fun outings we may go on this winter to relieve cabin fever need to be free. Better yet, we need to get paid to go do fun things.

I'm not the type of mom that will never allow her children to watch any TV (obviously). But I can't seem to find a balance between a little bit of TV a few times a week and fun, engaging, educational activities that Blake can have fun with. It's kind of turning into this vicious cycle I can't seem to break.

Tell myself no TV today.



Eats crayons.

Crayons taken away.




Tries to destroy our DVDs.

DVDs taken away.


Snack time.


Throws books.

Book hits Mom.

Patience is gone.



And it's not even noon yet.

I'm not complaining about how difficult motherhood is. I just hate feeling like a bad mom because of my lack of patience and willingness to plop my kid in front of the television for a few minutes of peace. Inevitably those few minutes turn into 90 minutes. I just feel kind of stuck in these bad habits I'm creating.


Lindsay said...

Confession: the TV is on almost constantly at our house in the colder months. Sometimes I feel bad about that, but then I remember that we are out doing awesome stuff as soon as the weather perks up. You are not a bad mom. It's a rough time of year. And a rough age. Who am I kidding -- motherhood is rough. There are good phases and difficult phases to motherhood just like there are for the kids you're trying to raise. Cut yourself a bit of slack -- I know you deserve it. :)

Marie said...

If it makes you feel at all better, today after arriving home from Costco, hauling Paul and a bunch of groceries from the car and up the stairs, I plopped Paul down in his highchair, gave him a snack, turned on a Russian cartoon, and locked him in on his own while I went back out to get what else I could carry from the car. How's that for bad and neglectful mother. It was the first time I had tried it, but it worked so well I am going to have to make promises to myself that I won't do it again.

Emily said...

Okay, what's so bad about leaving your kid in the apartment to carry your groceries in? If you had a driveway and a garage, wouldn't you do the same? Except for maybe locking everything?

I wish I had ideas for you. I have vague memories of doing all sorts of cooking and cleaning while Elizabeth just hung out and played by herself. But that may be b/c she's a girl. Or it may be me misremembering. Do you have blocks? Duplos? Have you tried pots and pans and a wooden spoon? Matchbox cars?

Chelsea said...

I hear ya! Kyler didn't watch any TV at all until about Blake's current age, and then I'd let him watch a show (or two) so I could get some rest when I was preggo with Cam because I was SO TIRED. Now he still watches a show every morning while I prep myself for the day (and no that doesn't mean shower...haha, like I have time for that....) I used to feel bad about it, but now I just accept that I can't do everything the way I want to. I do try to make sure he watches educational things as well as Toy Story and Cars, but you have to give yourself a break every now and then.